Day 218: Oh My God, Is That Sarah Duxbury!?!?!?!

I’m going to start off today by putting my honest foot forward and say that I wasn’t the biggest fan of what we got up to. Unlike the volcano experience, which was new and exciting, today’s trips didn’t compare. We hired a driver for the entirety of the day and got him to take us to four separate locations. Each place was about an hours drive apart, so to save time, I won’t bother writing about the journeys in between, instead I’ll just write the names of the places, and explain what we did and saw at each one. Because of all the driving involved, today has felt quite long, here’s hoping it won’t take as long to write about.

We didn’t have the luxury of a lie in this morning. With the alarm waking us up at 8am, we got up and went for breakfast. We each enjoyed our meals and had only a small amount of time afterwards to return to our rooms and pack a day bag.

With such items as sunglasses, cameras, and mosquito repellents packed, we went to reception to find our driver waiting for us. When we were all sat inside the car Sarah told the driver the plan. He then devised the best route in which to take. From where we were in Ubud, he told us it would be easiest, and quickest, if we drove to the most northernly location first. It took an hour or so to reach Git Git, and we all felt a little travel sick by the time we’d arrived, after going around all the windy hilly roads.

Git Git: had three separate waterfalls to admire. Because I’d already seen a mightily impressive set of waterfalls in Laos, I felt as though I could check it off my bucket list. So at first I wasn’t that excited about seeing any more, although that all changed as we were guided around the grounds. The man spoke very good English, and he’d stop us at every plant we came across. Most of which were coffee related. He showed us Bali coffee, vanilla bean, as well the many banana trees. It was very educational. He surprised us when he said he’d been travelling himself. Through his job at the waterfalls he’d met many people from all over, including Sydney, Australia. He explained that he was able to visit them because they’d pay for everything. He also told us how he’d worked in a kiwi factory in New Zealand. He was a very nice man and had been doing his job for the past 10 years. What he really wanted to do now was move to a different area of Bali and become a taxi driver, he said there was more money to be made doing that, as currently he had to rely on tips as added income. We only paid to look at 2 waterfalls, the third was a 2km walk away which was too far. When we reached the first one we could’ve got in the water if we’d wanted, but after learning the temperature was only 16 degrees, we changed our minds. The second waterfall was the most dangerous. Our guide explained that there had been two deaths in total. Both tourists got too close to the edge and slipped on the wet rocks. The water underneath the waterfall acted like a whirlpool and they couldn’t get out. After seeing both falls we returned to the beginning. Just as we were about to get back in the car, it hammered down. The roads were so wet and windy that the two boys on the motorbike in front of us slid and fell. We were lucky not to run them over. It was about another hour drive until we reached Bedugul temple and lake.

Bedugul Temple and Lake: was an area which happened to be massively overpopulated. Where all these tourists had come from was anyone’s guess, but it mostly appeared to be teenagers on school trips. Although it was hot and sunny when we arrived, there were dark clouds making their way across. This in turn ruined the photo we took of the temple, as the mountain in the background was hidden behind fluffy black characters. While Sarah and I were trying to take pictures of a certain part of the temple, we were both approached by an Asian couple. They asked us if we’d mind posing for a photo with her husband. We did, but then I was shoved aside for the next photo when the guy wanted to stand closer to Sarah. I’d never felt so rejected. We presumed they were done and swiftly moved on, only to run into them again two minutes later. This time the lady wanted a photo taken with Sarah, while I was left on the sidelines looking like a fat kid waiting to be picked for a sports team. The grounds were beautifully preserved. All the grass was mown, the flowers were extremely colourful, and all the statues and buildings were in great shape. There happened to be a ceremony as we walked around, but we couldn’t go and watch because we weren’t Hindu. That didn’t stop me peeking over the wall though. We didn’t stay at the temple and lake long, but before we left, something truly magical happened. If ever Sarah wanted to feel like a pop super star, today that dream came true. As we headed towards the exit we saw a large group of Malaysian teenage girls. Instantly they spotted Sarah, and in unison shouted over “hello”. When Sarah said hello back they begged her to take a photo with them. This had to have been some sort of record, there were at least 12 girls crowding around to pose with the golden haired one. Sarah only allowed the one photo to be taken when she realised she’d be there for a while otherwise. As soon as the first one was taken, the girls began fighting between themselves to get as close to her as they could. Obviously I wasn’t going to let a moment like that pass without documenting the moment on camera. We then returned to our taxi with the infamous Sarah Duxbury hidden underneath a coat. Not really.

Jatiluwih: was the name of the large rice paddies we visited next. Ubud was mostly made up of these, and this is the main reason why the place is so green. But Jatiluwih was slightly different in the sense that it was ginormous. Most of the rice fields you see around Ubud are small, but the ones here went on for as far as the eyes could see. It was a shame the weather was so miserable, as otherwise we’d have taken a stroll around to admire it in all its glory. There was every shade of green conceivable, from lime through to emerald. While we were there we remembered a recommended restaurant in the Lonely Planet. It encouraged tourists to try the suckling pig. Our driver dropped us off right outside the front door. Before getting out we gave him some money for his dinner as well. Apparently when you hire a driver for the whole day, it’s considered kosher to pay for their meals. Simon handed the guy some money then we went inside to eat. We had an astonishing view of the paddies while we ate, and the food was just as nice as the view. The pork was so tender that it practically fell apart in your mouth. When we’d finished, the loudest clap of thunder happened right above our heads, we could feel the vibrations it caused. It was so powerful that it set off some car alarms down the street. Our driver returned from where he was eating and took us to the final stop of the day, Munduk.

Munduk: was the name of the temple we stopped at on the way back to our resort. It took a while to get there, because on the way we got stuck behind a large group of Hindus walking down the street playing music as part of a ceremony. Much like a hearse carrying a coffin, it would’ve been rude to overtake. Meaning we had to stay behind them for a good 20 minutes. The temple happened to be the briefest stop of the day. This was mostly because the time was almost 5pm, and we only had our driver for another half an hour. The blessing was, because of the time, it meant there weren’t that many people there. We paid the admission price, then walked around the designated pathway for tourists. It took us around the outside of the temple where we could see some Hindus praying. They were dressed all in white, and the temple itself was beautiful. It looked like a well preserved ruin – if that’s possible. The bricks looked very old, and the whole area was surrounded by a moat. Because the sun was beginning to set, at certain angles it made for very good pictures. After we’d walked around the perimeter, we returned to our taxi. On the way we spotted many cockerels in cages, when we later asked our driver about this he told us they were used as part of a pre ceremony event. Unfortunately the event was cock fighting. Apparently it’s only illegal when betting is involved, but it’s perfectly fine so long as it’s for religious purposes. It makes me sick. When we got back to the car we were driven for another 40 minutes before we reached Inata.

He dropped us off at the gates, then we asked him if he’d mind taking us somewhere else tomorrow. Only this time it would be at the earlier hour of 8am. I hate early starts. The poor man’s day wasn’t over just yet, he told us that in the evenings he is involved with the dance shows as one of the chanters. He’d also be doing the same tomorrow night, one thing you couldn’t call him was lazy. Sarah and myself then spent the next hour or so in the swimming pool, while the others watched from the loungers. Like usual, around 6pm the Mosquitos came out and we retreated to our rooms, where for the next hour and a half we remained.

At 7:30pm we caught the shuttle to Cafe Des Artistes for tea, that was the initial plan at least. On the way Sarah spotted an Italian based restaurant. Outside was a sign which read “margarita pizza, 30,000 rupiah”. That was the equivalent of £2. SOLD!!! I was so hungry by this point that even the place mats looked appetising, and much like the Cookie Monster, I’d have gobbled them down. The food was so cheap that I ordered two dishes, a pizza and spaghetti bolognese. Little did I know they’d take forever and a day to arrive. There are three words I’d use to describe that place… SLOWEST. SERVICE. EVER. The food took so long to arrive that I almost went full circle and came right back around to being sated, it also made me regret asking for the bolognese to arrive first. When it eventually showed up, I don’t think I breathed between mouthfuls. It can’t have taken me any more than 2 minutes to clear the mountain of noodles. I then had the misfortune of waiting another 15 minutes on my pizza. They did apologise the whole time, so I can’t be that mad, but it felt like an eternity every minute I had to wait. Because we told the shuttle driver to come get us at 9pm, Ann and Simon went on to the shop while Sarah and I waited on my food. When it came, I cleared it just as fast as the spaghetti. Sarah and I then settled the bill and met her parents outside. Two minutes later our shuttle arrived.

Back at the resort we briefly discussed what time to get up in the morning to have breakfast… 7:15am. SEVEN FIFTEEN!!!! I was now beginning to wonder if we’d ever get a day off travelling again. It was only 9:15pm and I was shattered. We said our good nights outside our room, then somehow I managed to muster up the energy to write this post. It’s now 11pm and I am looking forward to sleep. I’d need all the energy I could get, as tomorrow we’d be snorkelling a shipwreck.

Day 217: The Day With No Name

By comparison to yesterday’s action packed shenanigans, today was slow and boring. We did nothing bar eat breakfast, sit by the pool, go into town, and go out for tea. That is it. Literally, that is it. I don’t even know what to name today, I can’t think of anything witty at all. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining about it at all, it was quite nice to relax for once. Since Sarah’s parents arrival we’d been moving nonstop. I think they were quite happy to do nothing as well. I will do my best to elaborate on the day’s happenings, but don’t be expecting a lengthy read by all means.

Our day started at 8:55am. The alarm was set for that time because Sarah’s parents preferred to have breakfast early. Thanks to all the walking and swimming the previous day, I was out for the count. I was in such a deep sleep that when I awoke and stretched, I thought I was a balled up piece of paper unravelling itself. For once Ann was impressed when she came to our door because we were up. When Sarah and I were dressed, the 3 of us went for breakfast.

For the first time since our arrival, new guests were beginning to check in. Because of this, before having breakfast, Simon and Ann did the trick of putting towels on the loungers in the hopes of reserving some. Something they’d probably leaned from the German couple during their bike ride yesterday. Ann, Sarah, and myself all had the same meal, strawberry pancakes. To say they were small, we all struggled to clear our plates. Afterwards we went over to the pool area where we spent the majority of the afternoon. To be honest there’s not very much for me to say. I started off listening to my iPod on one of the loungers, and because of the heat I sweat buckets. I sweat so much in fact that the material of the lounger cushion left an imprint of my body on it. It resembled the chalk outline of a body at a crime scene. The funny thing about the heat, although it was hot, Sarah and I didn’t mind it. It wasn’t until her parents came out that we realised we’d acclimatised. They always chose to stay under the shelter of a parasail, and it’s too cold for us to go in their room because of how frosty 18 degrees feels to us now. At the beginning of this trip we were the ones setting the a/c that low, nowadays it’s all about the 25. I spent the afternoon lying in the sun working on my blog and going for a swim when I was too sweaty. Around 4:30pm we thought about going out for dinner. We returned to our rooms to get ready, then walked down the cobbled hill to town.

There was a slight problem at the bottom. A solemn monkey from the sanctuary was busy eating leaves. Ann was petrified of them after our visit the other day, and stayed close to the others as they passed. We followed a different street this time around and bought a few items. I bought two new pairs of shorts for the beach and pool, while both Sarah and I bought gifts for friends. Again, I can’t say what they were in case they’re reading this. By now shopping enraged me. I never enjoyed it, and every other shop sold exactly the same things, yet we still found ourselves stopping in each one. Fortunately, during this visit there weren’t that many to look at, but we were walking so slowly that it drove Simon and I crazy. After about half an hour a storm came over head and forced us into the shelter of a nearby cafe. This was where Ann was introduced to Pad Thai, but sadly it was a bad one. It had no flavour and was full of spicy evilness. Ann then said she’d never have one again, the poor thing didn’t know what she was missing. After dinner we continued up the road, only to come back on ourselves. There were no more shops to look at, so we ended up going back in the ones we’d already visited. Eventually we reached the slip road which took us back to our resort. I told Sarah this was my stop, then Simon and I left the girls to visit a spa, while we returned to Inata.

When we got back all we did was sit on the loungers beside the pool. I briefly signed into Skype to see what was happening, and as luck would have it, my nan was online. I gave her a quick ring to see how everything was going, and I showed her our resort. When my uncle showed up at her house I gave him the same treatment. He predicted the beautiful resort cost us £60 a night… sucker, it only cost us £30! The phone call lasted around 40 minutes. When I’d hung up I returned to find a sleeping Simon. Together we tried to figure out why the tablet still wouldn’t read my sd card. I gave it one last try by wiping the card clean and blowing into the sd port, Ureka, it worked. Sarah would be happy, all our tv shows were back, as well as our photos from the early parts of the trip. In that moment I felt like a technological genius. Next up, the build of an Ironman suit. Around 6pm the Mosquitos came out, so we returned to our rooms.

I took a quick shower then got into bed to watch a newly saved tv show. After it had finished I began writing about the day. I managed to write the first paragraph before Ann and Sarah came back. 7:45pm was the time, and those pampered princesses had been out this whole time getting various treatments. My mind was elsewhere when Sarah got in, and she began asking me what I’d been up to since she’d been gone. I sort of answered them, but I’m not fully aware of where my mind was. 5 minutes previous I was in bed in my own little world typing away, then out of nowhere Sarah disturbed the peace. She then sarcastically said “yes the spa was great, thanks for asking!!” My mind was everywhere and nowhere at the same time, and I hadn’t thought to have asked her. I was thinking we’d be going out for dinner and we’d talk about it then. With a newly p***** off girlfriend we got ready to go out.

Sarah and Ann had made a plan for what we should do the next day. They had discussed it with their taxi driver on the way back from the spa earlier on. Everything they had in mind was a good 2 or 3 hour drive from the resort, so if we wanted to do the various trips they’d have to be spaced out over two days. We all discussed it with the staff of our resort to get a better feel for everything, then caught the shuttle bus into town. We were dropped off outside Starbucks, then walked down our second different street of the day to locate a lovely restaurant. It was called “Nomad” and prided itself on selling foods that contained no additives. There was a brief explanation at the front of the menu which told the story of the owner. He looked to be a successful man having founded several different businesses throughout Indonesia, and named the restaurant “Nomad” because of the many places his job takes him. Their food was great, and afterwards we walked back to Starbucks to get our shuttle back. Because we were running 5 minutes late, the driver had walked up the street to greet us, at first I almost mistook him for another taxi driver trying to get our business. I had to stop myself from shouting over “no thank you” when I recognised his face. Back at the resort we booked a taxi for another all day session tomorrow, and returned to our rooms. Sarah and I then got into bed and concluded the evening with a movie called “I give it a year”. To say its an example of a British comedy making a comeback is an insult. Neither of us found it funny, in fact, I imagine it was about as enjoyable as reading today’s post. If so, I am terribly sorry!

Day 216: DRAAAAAGOOOOO!!!!!

Today, much like Rocky in Rocky 4, we climbed a mountain. But unlike Rocky In Rocky 4, we didn’t run to the top and scream the name of his Russian opponent. Also unlike Rocky in Rocky 4, we didn’t do it for training purposes, instead we simply climbed to the top for s**** and gigs. I was mighty impressed with myself and the others with me, because we found it surprisingly easy. None of us were out of breath when we reached the summit. The day started really early. With an alarm set for 1:40am we crawled out of bed and began getting ready.

Sarah and myself stood at the entrance to our resort a little later than 2am, I think it was closer to ten past by the time we got there. At first we thought we’d missed the pick up, as on our receipt it said to be ready between the hours of 2am and 2:15am. When the clock read 2:30am we began to worry. To find out what was going on we had to wake the sleeping receptionist. He was led on the floor behind the counter, as I got close he sprang to life, startling me slightly. He rubbed his sleepy eyes and put on his glasses, then told me I’d have to phone the number because he couldn’t read it. No sooner than I was about to pick up the receiver, a car pulled up. It was our ride.

The driver apologised for being late, and told us he’d made the mistake of going to a different Inata resort first. There was already one other tourist in the car, his name was Tony, and came from Finland. If you want to know what he sounded like, just say this sentence in your best Count Dracula impression:
“My name is Tony, and I come from Finland, mwoa ah ah!”
Ok, he didn’t say “mwoa ah ah”, but you get my point. There were four of us doing the day trip in total after we stopped to grab Matilda from her hotel. Matilda came from Cambridge, and as soon as she got in the car she began chatting. Whereas Tony kept to himself all day, and only spoke when spoken to. It was now close to 3am, and the first thing on the agenda was breakfast. Our driver took us to a coffee plantation on the way to Mount Batur. There we were each served a banana pancake, and had to endure the awkward moment when the plantation owner brought out samples of the many coffees he sold. They never reveal their true intentions until you start sampling their products. There were 5 different coffees in small cups placed in front of us. At first we feared one of them was the Luwak poo coffee, after seeing a poster advertising it behind us. It turned out none of them were, as it was too expensive to give away as samples. As soon as we started drinking, the owner came over and began putting his packaged coffees on the table and said, “if you like, you can buy? I have many different sorts”. None of us wanted to buy any, yet we felt obliged to because of how awkward we felt. Sarah was quick to respond saying we had no money. Then the owner walked away leaving the products on the table staring at us. Eventually our driver came to the rescue and took us away.

The drive to the bottom of the mountain was only 15 minutes from the plantation. When we got there our guide introduced herself to us (although I forgot her name instantly I’m ashamed to say). We each took a quick bathroom break, and were given torches afterwards to light the way. It was pitch black all the way to the top, and because there were no buildings to cause any light pollution it meant the night sky was painted with billions of little white dots. The stars shone so brightly above our heads, but our cameras couldn’t pick them up, and it was a shame we didn’t stop frequently enough to appreciate them. I liked the pace our guide set for us, it was very quick. There were many other groups attempting the same feat as us, but we passed them every time they’d stop. I think we stopped all of two times on the way up. Once to have a drink of water, where we met a cute little girl selling water, named Kirsty, and a second time for our guide to make an offering at a shrine. She thanked us for waiting for her, then marched us up the rest of the way. It was tricky in sections because of the loose rocks. I was surprised, because of how fast we were ascending, that none of us were out of breath. To say the only exercise we get these days involves lugging a holdall between accommodations, we did very well to feel as good as we did. Perhaps all that walking in Singapore had prepared us for this. The higher we climbed the more clear the air was to breath in. I’d forgotten what brisk air felt like, because of our altitude, and the time of day, the air was thinner and less humid. For a second it felt like home, and almost as if someone switched on a giant air conditioning unit in the sky. Just before we reached the halfway point our guide slipped on a wet rock, and cut one of her arms and legs. It wasn’t bad, but she made one hell of a thudding sound as she hit against the rocks. Afterwards she told us she walks to the top of the volcano everyday, and that was the first time she’d slipped. At 5:30am we’d reached the halfway point and the world around us was flat and smooth, no more jagged rocks to watch out for. It was here our tour guide gave us some bad news.

She told us that our trip ended there, something we hadn’t been told at the time of booking. The people we’d booked with also said water would be provided, which it wasn’t, hence why the young girl, Kirsty, was flogging the stuff. Our guide then explained that if we wanted to go to the peak we could, and it was up to us how much we wanted to pay her to take us there. After a team huddle, and brief discussion, the decision was unanimous. Of course we wanted to go all the way to the top, what would be the point in climbing all that way only to stop at the halfway point. Seeing as it was only another 20 minute walk we agreed that 50,000 each would be sufficient enough for her. It’s always difficult when they say “it’s up to you”, as you never know what’s considered fair. The last thing we wanted was to come across as offensive. Even at the halfway point we didn’t stop for a rest, our guide knew that if we wanted to make it in time for sunrise, we’d need to leave ASAP. The sun was already changing the colour of the sky in the distance. So off we marched up the steepest slope yet, overtaking more groups as we went. This section was slightly more dangerous than the last. Instead of loose rocks to worry about, we had to go careful not to slip on the black pumice. If we did, the only thing to grab ahold of was the sharp volcanic rocks. Fortunately we all made it without any injuries, all except for Sarah, who got a slight boo boo on the palm of her hand.

To be at the top of the volcano gave me a great sense of elation. They say “nothing in life is worth having if it comes easy”, and I’d just like to say that the view we got to witness definitely didn’t. It was unlike any other I’d seen on earth. As we sat at the edge of the mountain, overlooking all that lay before us, our guide told us we were very lucky that it was so clear. All this week it had been cloudy and raining. I didn’t envy previous climbers in that moment, it was very cold already, had it been raining as well it would have been close to freezing. We could see for miles around. In the distance was the tallest mountain, Mount Agung. Off to the side of that, a little farther away, we could see Lombok, one of the Gili islands. At first it was fairly dark, the sun was still low in the sky at this point, and all that shone from behind the clouds was a red and orange wave of colour. We could just about make out the silhouette of Agung, and see the sheet of clouds praying at its feet. More and more became illuminated with the suns appearance. At first it took its time to rise, but when it started moving you could practically see it climbing higher and higher. The sky looked as though it was warming up. Colours of red, orange, yellow, pink, green, blue, purple burst through the clouds as if someone had spilled paint pots everywhere. Even with all the photos we took, we couldn’t capture what we saw. It was like heaven’s doors had opened, and out walked an angel. In the very moment the sun peered over the clouds, it was almost as if Mother Nature herself was being revealed. It was a moment that will stay with me forever. Much like the Perhentian islands of Malaysia, it’s something I’ll never truly be able to put into words. I felt something that morning, and suddenly I was more grateful than ever for everything I’d seen and done these past 7 and a half months. This truly was what travelling was all about, and to think that if I hadn’t taken the redundancy at work I’d still be there now, missing all of this.

With the sun above the clouds we could finally see everything transparently clear. The clouds floated gently above the lake below like an inviting bed from the gods. They were so close that we were tempted to see if we could run across the tops of them. All around us was nothing but greenery, the hills, the fields below, the rice paddies. It looked like Eden. Now, years of drawing cartoon volcanos as a child gave me extensive knowledge as to how a volcano should look, and what we were sitting on certainly didn’t coincide with my pictures. Instead of the grey quadrilateral looking shape with a wavy line of red lava, and a cloud of smoke bellowing from the top, the real thing was grassy, grey, and no sign of lava anywhere. There wasn’t even a giant pit with lava at the bottom. This was probably a good thing, because had it looked like my drawings, we’d all be singed to a crisp, and in years to come we’d be a tourist attraction like the poor people of Pompeii. While we were sat admiring the view our guide brought over our second breakfast of the day. It was an unorthodox meal to say the least, banana sandwiches and one hard boiled egg. I ate mine, and ended up eating Sarah’s when she couldn’t stomach it any longer. It wasn’t long after that, that our guide suggested moving on.

It wasn’t that much farther to the highest peak of the volcano, and when we got there we were surprised with what we saw. Monkeys. There were actually monkeys at the top of a volcano, I’ve seen it all now. I think it was probably because food was being cooked there that they stayed, but where they’d come from in the first place was the biggest mystery. Mind you, there were a coupe dogs walking around when we were eating our sandwiches. The people who prepared the food used the heat from the volcano to cook it. There was a cavern which they used as a large oven. The top made for very nice photos, not only because we could see down the volcano (which was a grassy hill with steam coming out) but because from the other side we could see all the open green land. It resembled what I’d like to imagine Canada looks like. After another short stop to take more photos, we continued along the rim of the volcano.

This part of the trek was the most precarious. We had to walk along a thin stony ridge. One wrong move would see us falling to our deaths. Had we been in England this sort of behaviour wouldn’t have been allowed. Health and Safety wouldn’t be able to cope. Although it was dangerous, it didn’t stop Sarah and myself stopping to take photos every 5 minutes. Poor Tony had to stop every time because he was behind us the whole way. Once again the trolls made their appearance. By now they’d travelled farther than my uncle, who in his 40 something years has never left England. I was slightly embarrassed as I tried to take a picture of them, because people who passed me were staring. They only laughed, but when you’re almost 25 and you’re playing with trolls, people tend to judge. The sights only got better as the walk went on, which you’ll be able to see at the bottom of this blog. After we’d circled the entire rim we made the descent back to the bottom. It was even harder to go down, Sarah had to hold on to the tour guide’s hand because she found it so difficult. The black pumice gave out underneath our feet at every step. It was a similar experience to walking down a sand dune, there was nothing we could do about it but move slowly. To compensate for the loose terrain I found it easier if I walked with my legs slightly bent, meaning they were tensed the whole way – something that caused them to feel like jelly later on. Eventually we were back on the path we followed up, and the ground below us was rocks again. This wouldn’t have been so bad had sarah and I been wearing a different pair of shoes, but the dap like material our trainers were made of meant we felt every stone. By the end I was used to it, and treated it like a reflexology treatment, but because Sarah’s shoes were knock offs, it was nothing but agony for her. There was an annoying moment when we were close to the bottom. A group of hikers decked out in full hiking gear (I’m talking sticks, boots, brightly coloured waterproofs. They looked like skiers minutes the skis) were rude enough to push passed us. Well I say a group, the majority were polite enough to say excuse me and thank you where it was due, but there was one smaller older woman who wasn’t. In that moment we all wanted to grab her sticks and smash them with a rock. As we walked a little farther we were greeted by Kirsty again.

On the way up she’d asked us if we wanted some water, at the time we said no, but Sarah said we’d buy one on the way back down. However, she’d changed her mind because Matilda gave us a spare bottle. Not wanting to let the little kid down, I paid the extortionate price of 25,000 rupiah (almost £2) for a bottle of coke. It was her cute husky voice that won me over, and the fact she’d been lugging a backpack filled with glass bottles up and down the hill. She put us to shame, because she made it look easy, even jumping down rocks in places like a mountain goat. When our guide was ready she took us the final 20 minutes to the bottom. It all looked so much different in the light of day, although we’d walked it earlier on, we could only see our surroundings via torchlight. Everything was so colourful, and the lake below was reflecting the mighty Mount Agung perfectly on its mirror like still surface. Along the way she informed us that the volcano erupted back in the early sixties, killing 2000 people in the village below. After that, many of the villagers left to find a safer location, but even to this day there are families still living there who refused to move. When we reached the car park it was hard to believe we’d climbed all the way to the top, as we looked back to see what we’d accomplished. I was thankful it was dark when we’d arrived, as its gargantuan stature was intimidating. The four of us then paid our guide the 200,000 rupiah for taking us to the peak, then she walked us to our driver. We shook her hand and thanked her sincerely, then climbed in the minivan to sit on the soft leather seats, and enjoy some a/c.

We made one stop on the way back on a bridge overlooking both volcanos and the lake below. Mount Batur stood around 5600 and something feet, and we’d scaled it all the way to the top. After taking some more photos we got back in the minivan. Tony was dropped off at his hotel first, followed by Matilda. We got her details for Facebook and said our goodbyes, we were then taken around the corner to Inata Resort. The staff at our resort were so nice to us, even though the time was 11am they still served us breakfast. Their usual hours were between 7 and 10am. I guess it was extenuating circumstances for us, we had just climbed a volcano after all. We sat by the pool while they prepared it, then moved over to the restaurant area when it was ready. I uploaded one of the photos to Facebook during the meal, which annoyed Sarah slightly. She claimed it meant she had to eat alone, “hypocrite” is all I’ll say. After breakfast we spent the majority of the afternoon by the pool.

Ann and Simon were out on a day trip all day, riding push bikes around Ubud. So pretty much all day it was just Sarah and I. I think I may have an addictive personality. I’ve said before that I’m not one to do things by halves. Even though my legs felt like jelly from the volcano trek, I pushed myself to spend the afternoon swimming. I did breast stroke, front crawl, back crawl, butterfly, every type of movement possible. Although the pool wasn’t very big, it was enough to make my body ache afterwards. The whole time I was doing that, Sarah was working in her tan. The sun wasn’t out for long, and for the most part, the weather was overcast with a chance of rain. Yet Sarah still managed to get some colour, perhaps it was the new tanning oils her parents had brought out. When we grew tired of the pool we returned to our room to watch a tv show. By now it was around 3pm, and Sarah’s parents STILL weren’t back. We went back to the pool for a further half hour, to an hour, then called it a day and waited on their return in our room. Somewhere around half past four they showed up.

They appeared to have enjoyed their trip. Ann seemed ecstatic about the whole day. She said it was very educational, as they learned fun facts from their guides. They shared the trip with a German couple. Although, they said they didn’t do all the uphill sections like they did. For which they were glad, because by the end they said the Germans clothes were ringing with sweat. They also happened to enjoy the dance show the previous evening while Sarah and I slept. I think they liked the show more than the bikes though, as Ann isn’t the most confident on the two wheeled vehicles. We all spent some time telling each other about our trips, and Ann and Simon couldn’t rave about the dance show enough. Although Sarah had already seen one on her last visit to Bali, it sounded like something we’d have to do again. We were all tired from our excursions, plus Sarah and I had been up since 1:40am. Instead of going out immediately, instead we stayed in our rooms for a couple hours. I used that time to rest while writing my blog.

At about 6pm Sarah, Simon, and I went out for tea. Ann wasn’t feeling too good after picking up a bug from somewhere. All evidence pointed towards the tap water. They’d been using it to fill their kettle for cups of tea. So Ann stayed in bed, while the three of us went back to Cafe Des Artistes. Now that my cold had gone I’d be able to eat, taste, and enjoy one of their many dishes. Rather than have the steak again, I chose the marinated BBQ chicken for the same price. It was amazing. At the end, when we asked for the bill, we also got them to phone our resort for a pick up in an hour and a halves time (9:15pm). This would give us enough time to look around the shops. This time I didn’t mind shopping as much because we were looking for presents for our friends. We managed to find a couple little things, but nothing worth writing down here (besides, it needs to be a surprise for our friends). One thing I did notice as we walked the streets were the amount of beggars. The most popular being the mother carrying a baby, if it wasn’t her it was young children sat with their hands out. As heartbreaking as it is, and was, to see, we kept walking, ignoring their pleas. I always feel so bad though, if I could afford to I’d give them the world. Plain and simple. We briefly stopped in a convenient store for some water, then walked back to Cafe Des Artistes for our pick up.

Fortunately the drivers arrive ahead of time to get you, as when we got back there were still 15 minutes to spare. I don’t think we were waiting any longer than 5 minutes before he showed up. We had to pick up one more guest from our resort before heading back, the driver apologised for this, then we drove no more than 500 metres to find her waiting on the pavement. With a car full of passengers we returned to Inata. Ann was still sick and looked very uncomfortable in bed. We discussed how she felt, then Sarah remembered we might have some tablets from the time I was sick at the beginning of this trip. We both returned to the room, and she began searching the various medicine bags. She found some form of pill or another, before rushing back to her mother’s aid. I remained in the room getting ready for bed. When Sarah got back we watched some tv shows, and around 11pm she fell asleep. When “Family Guy” ended, I began typing up the rest of the day’s activities. It was 12am by the time I’d finished, meaning I’d nearly stayed up for 24 hours straight. Funnily enough I’m not that tired, although, my eyes do sting, and I am now able to transcend both time and space, but that’s normal right?

Day 215: Trucking Banker

Even when our intrepid hero thought he could finally rest, the opportunity was stolen from him. His day was ruined by the banking crisis. Not to the extremes of countries like Greece, but enough to require two to three hours of his time. Even after he solved the issue, with the help of the sage banker beside him, there were still other tasks which would plague him. After slaying the heart of the problem, he and his fellow men… and ladies, explored a palace to see its many treasures. When they’d seen all there was to be seen, the foursome dined like gods upon a mighty banquet. The day was relatively short for our hero and his woman, because in the early hours of the following morning, they had a behemoth quest of conquering a volcano. After their feast, the bravest and toughest hero of them all left his warriors to scour merchant’s stalls for goods. As he strolled back toward their homeland he had to cross the gauntlet of temptation. This place was home to many sirens who beckoned any man that passed with the cry “massage sir?” Our hero was too strong willed, and respectfully turned down the invites, as ultimately he knew where he needed to be. Thanks to his long legs the journey back took no time at all. He was then given a key by the fabled receptionist which granted him access to his home. The mighty warrior, with great hair, then led on the bed and began writing what he’d experienced that day as a memoir for all the people of the land. When he was done he attempted to rest, as tomorrow he’d be facing his mightiest enemy yet, the omnipotent and fiery Mount Batur.

Apologies if that didn’t make sense to anyone. I was just trying to see how good my creative writing skills were. Allow me to rephrase the whole thing in modern talk… By the way, I was the brave and mighty hero for all those sill in the dark. It has been a very short day today. In fact, I’d say its been the shortest one this trip. Sarah and I needed to go to bed earlier than usual because we had to get up by 2am to climb Mount Batur. So in total today was only around 9 hours long. Now lets get to it.

• We were woken up at 9:45 this morning by Ann banging on the door. This time however, she’d played knock out ginger by running away. Sarah and I had overslept and would’ve been late for breakfast otherwise. So today we were happy for her presence. Quickly we got dressed, then enjoyed breakfast like we did the day before, with the staff still being utterly attentive.

• After brekkie we spent the morning, and a couple hours of the afternoon, beside the pool. I read over the previous days blog and was so happy when I’d finished it. It meant I could spend the rest of the time in the pool. That was until I remembered I had to do some online banking to see if everything was ok. I felt really bad about dragging Sarah’s mum into it though. Back home Ann works for the bank I’m with, and right now she was supposed to be on holiday. Little did I know at the beginning we’d end up spending 2 – 3 hours trying to figure it all out. I am really really sorry for that Ann. I didn’t fully understand my credit card anytime I checked it online, and always found myself throwing money at it to cover our travels. Ann took the time to explain everything to me, but noticed something was off. There was a direct debit coming from somewhere, and was paying the bills for me. After looking at the other accounts I had with the bank, we still couldn’t figure it out. Not a single one had a direct debit set up. It was then we remembered I was a member of a different bank. Before leaving England, Sarah and I set up an account with a different branch because they offered cheap rates abroad. It wasn’t until we started using it that we realised it actually cost us more money to use their card. So after several weeks at the start of the trip we stopped using it. I had forgotten it was with that bank account I’d set up the direct debits. With our fingers on the pulse we sorted it out and finally got back on track. We happily logged off, forgot about the money issues, and got on with our day. All I had left to do was phone my mum to see if she could sort out the rest back home.

• We all returned to our rooms to get ready for the day, however short it may have been. 10 minutes later we had an idea of where we wanted to go. In town there was a water palace which looked very interesting, so we got the resort’s shuttle bus to take us there. However we ended up having a different driver than usual, as the usual driver had already taken some other guests out. This driver was very friendly, and spoke rather loudly. He made it a bit awkward when he found out where we were from. He told us we were lucky because we could travel to Bali, but he couldn’t afford to go anywhere else. It would be too expensive for him, because in Bali it’s very difficult to save money, he explained.
“There are too many festivals and activities to spend your money on. No sooner than you earn it, you end up spending it” were his exact words. Simon did his best to redirect the conversation, and thankfully our stop wasn’t very far away.

• It appeared as though the taxi driver had misunderstood. We were dropped off at a resort instead. At least that’s what we thought. He explained the palace was around the back, we just had to walk through the resort first. When we reached the gates there was a man who dressed us in sarongs to grant us access. He wrapped it around our waists and tied a double knot. In our new outfits we began exploring the rather small grounds. There were signs around the buildings encouraging people not to climb on the steps. By far Hindu temples were the best. The amount of gargoyles they had were remarkable. Each one was highly decorated and resembled a scary monster of some sort. The reason for their presence was to scare off evil spirits. I couldn’t help but think that might send off mixed messages. If an evil spirit is coming, why would it be scared of something that looks like a monster? Surely they’d be used to that, because they themselves are evil. Maybe I’d just watched one too many movies. All the buildings were red and gold, and the statues between each one were of colossal proportion. I couldn’t get over the amount of detail they had, even down to something as small as a jewel on their belts. At one point my feet began to hurt. As I looked down I saw they were covered in red ants, they were all biting me in unison. Sarah also had the same unpleasant experience happen to her. We didn’t know if we’d stood on a nest, or if they were already on the sarong when we put it on. It was most likely to be the latter, as Ann also noticed she had a few on her legs too. Either way we brushed them off quickly before leaving.

• We didn’t need the sarongs for the next bit. As we left the sacred grounds we found ourselves in a courtyard, where two large ponds were separated by a concrete path. It was also the spot where traditional Hindu dances were put on to entertain and educate. There were two small boys with a fishing rod trying to catch the many aquatic animals below them. The small area made for very nice photos indeed. On the way out, Ann and Simon purchased tickets to watch one of the dances later on that day. Sarah and I didn’t as we’d be sleeping. We then made our way down the street to find something to eat. Although, that plan didn’t happen right away, no thanks to Sarah.

• Before finding the lovely restaurant we ended up at, Sarah spotted a market place. It wasn’t any good in my opinion, each small shop was stocked with items like sarongs, bags, trinkets, and for some odd reason, penis shaped bottle openers. The odd reason had something to do with the religion. Certain people believed the objects held the power to help couples conceive, they’d use it as fertility statue. Sarah could see we were all bored and gave up in the end, saying she’d come back on her own to have a look around. Besides, Ann didn’t like the constant gaze from the shop owners as they followed her around. Not much farther down the street was the restaurant we ate dinner. It was called Ibu Rai, and featured in the Lonely planet for its multicultural dishes. I had a hot chocolate along with my meal, in an attempt to help send me off to sleep in a few hours time. When we’d sorted out who owed what, I left the others to look around the shops. By now I had had enough of walking around the shops aimlessly, and instead chose to go back to the resort. There was nothing I wanted to buy for myself, and I’d seen it all before. Somehow Sarah always managed to find something she liked, even if it served her no purpose, such as a fancy plate or dish. During my walk back I was constantly asked if I wanted a massage from one of the many ladies sat outside each massage parlour. I said “no thank you” to each one, although I did want to shout “NO THANK YOU!” After the 20th person asked me. It didn’t take me long to get back to our resort, and just before I got there I could see the volcano in the distance clear as day. The light was shining from behind the triangular mountain in such a way that it practically forced it into the foreground. I took a photo and returned to the room.

• Inside I went about closing the curtains and switched off any light that was on, in an attempt to recreate the environment I’m used to as I typed. Seeing as I never get to bed until gone 3am these days… no thanks to this blog, I figured if I wrote in the dark, my brain would think it was nighttime and make me tired. That plan went out the window as soon as Sarah got back from the shops. Just as I was coming to an end with the day’s post, she turned on the lights and showed me what she’d bought. It was an item of clothing. In her defence it was a lovely dress, and it complimented her figure nicely… maybe I’m more tired than I thought writing sentences like that. Ann then came in and showed off her newly purchased trousers, before leaving Sarah with a sleeping pill. Seeing as I was up now, I Skyped my mum. After that, I got ready for bed at the early hour of 7pm. I’d not gone to bed that early since I was around 6 or 7 years old.

Day 214: Rumble In The Jungle

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

That disclaimer will make a lot more sense as the tale of today unfolds. I can even say no animals were harmed in the making of day 214, because they “definitely” weren’t. The first half of the day was very laid back. We stayed by the pool until mid afternoon, before going out to visit the Sacred Monkey Forest Sanctuary. That’s when things got a little exciting. We ate out a couple times, and Sarah and I booked up a day trip in the evening. On the whole it was a good day, now sit back and relax as I tell you all about it.

• Just one minute before the alarm clock rang Ann duxbury was at our door waking us from our sleep. She was stood on our porch with a little smile on her face as she bobbed on the spot. There’s something about a happy morning person when you’ve just woken up that makes you slightly peeved. Just where do they find the energy. I guess either way we’d have been annoyed, as in 60 seconds time the alarm would have rang at the unorthodox time of 9:23am. That’s right, the previous evening when I’d set it I didn’t play by the rules. Who says the alarm has to be set on a multiple of ten or five. I play by my own rules!

• It only took us 3 minutes to get out of bed and dressed. Then the four of us went to the resort’s restaurant for breakfast. The all inclusive meal was great, we got so much for our money, and the staff were being extra attentive. Any time we were running low on our coffee, a boy would run over to top us up. The staff were so friendly towards us that at times it felt as though they were scared of us. I didn’t like it. I’d much rather have them crack a joke or two at my expense, I’d feel a lot more comfortable then. I’m not used to all the attention. After eating we spent the next 3 to 4 hours around the pool.

• At one point I returned to the room to catch up with the blog. By the end of the day I had done it, I was no longer behind on them. For the most part I alternated between the sun beds and the pool. Like usual Sarah and I messed around in it. I ran around as she sat in my shoulders, and I swam along the bottom in an attempt to see how long I could hold my breath. Ann got in eventually, but like most mums, she didn’t want to get her hair wet. Sarah didn’t take any notice and continued to splash her. The pair of us then raced her back and forth doing lengths of the 10 metre long pool. Around 2 – 3pm we returned to our rooms to shower and dry off.

• That process didn’t take too long, so while we were waiting, Sarah put on a tv show. She managed to get through one minute of it before Ann was at our door. Before leaving the resort we had to get directions. We wanted to go to the Sacred Monkey Forest Sanctuary, but didn’t know the way. The young female receptionist told us it was only a 7 minute walk from the resort, and how right she was. We followed a long cobble path, where motorbikes overtook us constantly. It was so bumpy that the riders struggled to stay on. When we reached the end we came out on Monkey Forest Road. To our right was the entrance to the sanctuary.

• We each had to pay 20,000 rupiah to get in, and I necked the can of coke I’d just bought before entering. The reason for this was because of the monkeys penchant for anything shiny. We didn’t have to go far before we met the first monkey of the day. He was fairly big, and sat on the floor just inside the entrance. He twisted his head around, observing all the tourists that passed as he chewed on some nuts. There were a lot of monkeys at the sanctuary (hence its name) many of which had various items in their hands that they’d procured from frightened tourists. The sanctuary was a remarkable place. All around us were thin vines hanging from tall thick trees, and everything was oh so green. Even the stone walls and gargoyles, which had moss growing all over them. There was a temple at the grounds, and for once people were allowed to enter so long as they wore the appropriate clothing. All except for menstruating women that is. It was strange to see that men had to wear more clothing than women if they wanted to enter. Usually it was the other way around, although, this was my first time near a Hindu temple, and I was still learning about their beliefs. That’s one thing I’ll take from this trip, the amount I’ve learned about other religions. As I walked around the sanctuary with my arms folded, I kept my iPhone firmly tucked under my armpit so no monkeys would see. I whipped it out any time I saw a monkey doing something funny. I was annoyed when I’d narrowly missed capturing one smiling at the other. Although I was slightly wary because that particular facial expression represents fear or aggression.

• Many people were scared of the monkeys, while others were slightly braver. One example of a brave person was a man sat on a wall. He allowed three monkeys to climb all over him… literally. An example of someone scared was when a woman had a monkey run up behind her and grab her handbag. The monkey didn’t get anything, but the experience left the girl shaken up. Luckily for her Simon was near, as he scared it off. Now, remember the disclaimer from earlier? Well this is where it “doesn’t” come in. A little while later we saw a monkey running towards a person with a bottle of water. The monkey really wanted the water and made several attempts to grab it. Unfortunately for the monkey this person didn’t want to give it up. Then, as a way of getting rid of the monkey, this person “definitely” didn’t hit it on the head with the bottle on sacred grounds. And this person “definitely” didn’t receive a cut on their finger because of the incident. And there “definitely” wasn’t a fear that this person might have contracted rabies because their thumb “definitely” didn’t catch on the monkey’s teeth.

• The monkey didn’t look hurt from the bop, and it even managed to get what it wanted in the end. It ran up the nearest tree with the bottle under its arm. We then saw the previous owner of the bottle getting treated for their wound at a nearby first aid room. It appeared as though the people were used to this sort of thing happening, as they had a whole lot of iodine and cleaning solution stocked up for such an event. After seeing the monkey chase after the bottle, Ann was a little frightened. So both her and Simon decided to meet us at the entrance, while Sarah and I explored the rest of the sanctuary. There was one final area down a set of concrete steps which led to a flowing river. It was very picturesque. It was dense with trees, and moss covered gargoyles. There were two large Komodo dragon statues which overlooked a stream of falling water, which made for excellent photographs. The best thing about the secluded area was the fact it was free of monkeys. The hairy bullies were nowhere in sight. We walked the narrow slippery pathway, following the river as far as we could, but it led to a dead end. All we could do then was return in the direction we’d come, and climb back up the concrete staircase. When we reached the top we noticed an Asian couple fighting with some monkeys. One of them had stolen the girls glasses, and the boyfriend was trying his hardest to get them back. Every time he moved closer, the mummy monkey threatened him. Eventually they got them back, but I don’t know how. We’d had enough by then, so we decided to go find Ann and Simon.

• The bottom of Monkey Forest Road, where we were, was filled with small gift shops and restaurants. We had to climb a slight hill before we found somewhere to eat, and I couldn’t help feeling it resembled a smaller version of Park Street in Bristol. The way the shops ran alongside the hill was just like it was back home. The restaurant we chose sold really nice Balinesian dishes. I had the sweet and sour crispy chicken with rice. I was so hungry that I hoovered it down before anyone else was halfway through theirs. I’d been ordering westernised dishes for a while, so it was refreshing to have rice again. Afterwards, Ann and Sarah wanted to look at the shops. I wasn’t interested, so I said I’d go on back to our resort. Sarah tried encouraging me to stay, but I said I needed the bathroom. She then let me go instantly, had I just learned a new get out of jail free trick?

• Simon also joined me in the return walk. When we reached the top of the cobbled hill we saw a gorgeous sunset. In the distance, behind the rice paddies, the sun was busy changing the colour of the sky. Off to the side of our resort in the distance we could make out the silhouette of a volcano. Another interesting sight was the mist at the other end of a rice field. It was so humid out that it caused a white cloud to form between the many trees. I took some pictures then we waited on the girls beside the pool. When Sarah got back she told me how she’d haggled down the price of a dress she liked, but because they had no money on them they couldn’t pay. That also explained why her shopping visit was so short lived. It was close to 6:30pm as we sat on the loungers, and the Mosquitos were just starting their shifts. We all decided to go back to our rooms for a while to let their presence blow over. That’s what Sarah and I said at least, it was just an excuse for us to watch tv shows in bed. And finally, FINALLY, we leaned who the mother is in “How I Met Your Mother”. 8 long seasons and the secret had been revealed. When that ended we went to Ann and Simon’s room to see how they were doing.

• We spent some time there while Sarah tried on her old clothes, which her parents had brought out for her. When everyone was ready, around 7ish, we caught the shuttle bus into town. We ended up back on Monkey Forest Road. To begin with, Simon and I followed the girls around the shops like two brain dead zombies. There was no real purpose for our visit, other than to eventually get some tea. I don’t like going out without an objective as I feel as though I’m wasting time. We alternated from one side of the street to the other, stopping in each shop that sold tea light holders and other trinkets, until we reached a tourist shop. Sarah and I ended up booking a day trip to climb a volcano in a couple days time. The downside was it would start at 2 – 2:30am. The hardest part would be getting to sleep early enough to be ready for it. We kept walking until we reached an area less habited by shops and restaurants, and decided to turn around and walk back where we’d just come from. On the way Simon purchased a couple frogs from a market stall for his pond back home. It was almost 9pm by this point, and our free shuttle was only free until 10pm, after that it charged. Quickly we found a place to eat, where I enjoyed another rice based meal, before we got the waiter to phone our resort for the shuttle home.

• As we waited outside for our driver, we were pestered by a friendly taxi driver looking for a fare. I kept telling him that we had a free shuttle coming, but he insisted on talking. I think he understood by the end, but that didn’t stop him from telling me how much he’d charge us. 100,000, that was over £5. Just gone 10pm the shuttle bus pulled up, and 10 minutes later we were back. We filled out the slips to let the staff know what we’d like for breakfast the next day, then returned to our rooms. Sarah and I then continued watching tv shows long into the night, but it was cut short when the sd card played up again. Bloody technology, I could procrastinate no longer and got to work on my blog. It was 3am by the time I’d finished.

Day 213: Eat, Pray, Loving Bali

Today was another active one, we didn’t stop from the time we got up to the time we went to bed. We hired a driver from a nearby tourist shop, and for 8 hours he escorted us around southern Bali. We visited three separate locations, but because they were so far apart it took a while to reach each one. When the day trip was over we returned to Seminyak to grab our bags, before being taken to Ubud. A place we’d be staying for the following 4-5 days to hopefully relax.

• The alarm clock rang at 8:30am, and what a horrible feeling that was. Initially I woke up with some energy after having a good nights sleep, so I used that to pack the last of my bags. Ann then came a knocking to let us know her and Simon were ready – bless ’em, they’d been up a lot longer than us. We did a final perimeter check to make sure we had everything, then headed to reception to put our bags in storage for the day.

• Today we’d be leaving the rather dirty looking Seminyak for the more attractive Ubud. However, instead of going straight there, we decided to hire a private driver for the day and visit various places before hand. We were hoping to have the same driver as the day before, but when we reached the tourist shop he was already out with other customers. In place of him we were given another driver. They were happy to accept the price we’d negotiated the night before, and one by one we climbed into the minivan.

• It was very hot inside the vehicle at first, but thankfully the a/c unit had three settings, and was directly in front of my face. We flicked the switched to the third dial, and cold air filled the vehicle. Simon was sat in the front and throughout the day he made small talk with the driver. He didn’t speak as good English as the guy before, and tended to repeat the last words of Simon’s sentences. Simon did better than I could, when the drivers can’t speak very good English I tend to find it a little awkward and prefer not to talk. The conversation usually sway towards football after they discover you’re English. A subject I know little to nothing about. Our first stop of the day was to a secluded beach called Jimbaran. All of our stops today were around the south of Bali. Like our taxi driver said the other day, you can see a lot of Bali in little time by hiring a private driver like we had. In the period of time you have them for you can cover a lot of ground. It took around 45 minutes to get to Jimbaran, but when we got there it was very pleasant.

• This was Simon and Ann’s first experience of the clear waters and white sands, and better yet we had it to ourselves. We still hadn’t had breakfast yet, and running alongside the beach were several restaurants. The first place we tried was very expensive and only sold seafood, but the second place was better with a more traditional menu. Ann, Sarah, and myself all had the chicken dish, but Simon stuck to his usual spicy dishes. While we waited for it to arrive Ann went for a stroll, taking pictures along the way. When she came back she looked really chuffed with what she’d captured. When the food arrived I couldn’t believe my luck. For the second time since being in Bali I’d received a good sized piece of chicken. A whole leg to be exact, and the seasoning which was added to it didn’t hurt one bit. By the end we considered it more brunch than breakfast because it left us all rather full. Whatever was left on the bones I fed to a hungry looking kitten. After settling the bill we returned to our driver who recommended the next location.

• He took us to Nusa Dua. This took the shortest amount of time to get to out of all the stops. Nusa Dua was an area you could go to for trips like snorkelling, diving, and sea walking. We explained to the men when we arrived that we weren’t interested in any of that, and instead just wanted to take a stroll along the beach. He told us we wouldn’t be able to, because surrounding the area were resorts, and each one owned a part of the beach, making it private to its guests only. So back to our minivan we went (after only 5 minutes of arriving) to be taken to a different place.

• Padang Beach was our next stop. The driver kept calling it Pegang Pedang, I don’t know if this was the correct name or not, but in the Lonely Planet it was just “Padang”. It was around another 45 minute drive to get there, and Simon kept the driver entertained with anecdotes about the British roads and cars. None of us knew if the driver fully understood, but he continued to repeat Simon’s last words as if he did. When we arrived we had to walk down several concrete steps to reach the cove like beach, but it was a lot different to the first one. It was busy to say the least. There were mostly Australian holiday goers on the sands occupying all the parasails. The sea was blue and clear, and the sand was the same colour as vanilla ice cream. Poor Ann couldn’t stick sitting in the sun without any shade, so she stayed with Simon at the bar, while Sarah and I got in the sea for a bit. Pedang Cove was featured in the “Eat, Pray, Love” movie, although the clever editing made it look a lot bigger. The waves were quite strong and frequent, making the relaxed bobbing Sarah and I were doing a little tricky. After 15 minutes we got out and dried off on the beach. When we were deemed minivan suitable, we rejoined Ann and Simon, and the four of us climbed the concrete steps. I think the heat and exertion was too much for Sarah’s parents, as when we reached the top they both asked for a rest. During that time a monkey appeared and grabbed the attention of every tourist with a camera. When the tired pair regained their breaths, we located our driver to be taken to yet another area.

• Our driver received a phone call from his boss at this point. The boss told him he had been out for “X” amount of hours already, and that our time was nearing its end. The driver explained to us that hiring a driver for a whole day meant only 8 hours. Given how far apart everything we wanted to see was, we had to be selective. Unfortunately we didn’t have the chance to go back to another beach, so instead we chose to go to Ulawatu (a Hindu temple), before returning to our hotel and moving on to Ubud. The temple was about 20-30 minutes away from Padang, and in the car park were mischievous monkeys. When one stall vendor wasn’t looking, two monkeys ran over and stole a piece of corn on the cob each. The man tried chasing them but ultimately gave up when he realised it was no use. It cost us 20,000 rupiah (just over £1) each to get in, and we had to wear a sarong to cover our knees as a sign of respect. Ann was terrified when the lady at the entrance said she should hide her glasses because the monkeys might steal them. What the lady didn’t know was that Ann is blind as a bat without them, and what Ann didn’t know was that this woman only said that to try and scare her into hiring her as a guide to keep the monkeys at bay. It’s a fact that the monkeys like shiny objects such as glasses, sunglasses, and cameras, but these items are usually stolen from the people who are dumb enough to get too close. With that said, no sooner than we walked around the corner we witnessed the first primate theft. A group of Chinese people were making their way out, when out of nowhere a monkey ran up behind a woman and snatched the camera from her hand. In the monkey’s defence, she was swinging it it back and forth from her wrist. I didn’t see if they managed to get it back, but they began shouting for help as it ran off into the trees looking at its new toy. One monkey even stole a baby’s toy and began tearing it to pieces, they are inquisitive I’ll give them that.

• The temple was nice, it was situated on the peninsula and overlooked the many cliff faces. I don’t think Simon was too impressed with the visit. Again, the worshipping grounds were closed off for Hindus only. We didn’t stay long, but we did appreciate the stone work and statutes around the temple while we were there. Ulawatu looked like something from a Tomb Raider game, I could just envision Lara Croft running around shooting those cheeky monkeys. At one point a young monkey tried taking a running jump to grab Simon’s water bottle, but it was no use. Simon stood his ground and lifted the bottle up high. The young monkey, feeling threatened, screamed at him and did a backward hop. That wasn’t the best part. The whole time Sarah had ahold of her mum, guiding her around because she wasn’t wearing her glasses. Because Ann couldn’t see, she was none the wiser to what was going on. So when the monkey screamed out, as did she. Ann then froze to the spot and a slight tear was shed out of fear. I’m pretty sure the monkey caused her to lose her poop too. When she regained her composure we made our way back to the minivan.

• In the space of time since leaving our hotel earlier that morning we had covered most of southern Bali. We then asked our driver to take us back to Grandma’s so we could grab our bags. This was the longest part of the journey because of traffic. We were stuck in the rush hour havoc from the temple, all the way back to our hotel. How our driver had the patience to manoeuvre the vehicle through it all was astounding. Any small space there was, was filled by anyone on a scooter, it was madness. After an hour or so we had made it. We quickly popped back in to grab our bags, then one by one they filled the spacious trunk. It took 2 hours to reach Ubud.

• After leaving Seminyak the roads opened up. They were long and quiet, and all around us was green. The tall trees, rice paddies, and thick forests were all that surrounded us. It was then I could see what all the fuss was about with Bali. It seemed so peaceful and different to Seminyak. This finally looked like somewhere that was more my speed, we would no longer need to rush about sightseeing, we could just chill out and relax. Our resort was possibly the nicest one we’d stayed at this whole trip. Mind you, for £30 a night I’d hope so too. Our Asian adventure was nearing its climax, and we were beginning to treat it more like a holiday. And why not. After some of the places we’d stayed, and the fact we’d be earning money again in Australia, we could afford to live like this for a while. The name of our resort was Inata, and it looked stunning. The staff at the resort were even more polite than Grandma’s, opening our doors as we arrived, and taking our bags right away. We were then given warm flannels and welcome drinks as we sorted out our reservations. The owner spoke with us for a food ten minutes, explaining how everything worked, and the various day trips they offered. The whole time Sarah and I were itching to see the room, at that point we weren’t paying any attention to what the man said. Eventually he stopped talking, then in groups of two we were shown to our rooms by the staff members.

• “OH MY GOODNESS!!!! Would you look at that”. There were two large sliding doors we had to go through to gain entry to the room, and what lay inside blew our minds. First of all the room was generously spacious. There was a large sofa that was nicer than mine was back home. A monstrous sized bed, which had to have been a queen size at least. The toilet and bathroom facilities were top notch, and the cosy lighting around the room made it feel really homely. We didn’t want to leave, especially after we were introduced by to the tv and DVD player. Funnily enough there was a copy of “Eat, Pray, Love” just sat there waiting to be played. It was everything we wanted and more. Sarah got a little grumpy with the shower after following the staff member’s instructions. She pointed the tap the way she was shown, but got nothing but cold water. When it was my turn I moved the tap in the opposite direction and enjoyed a hot steamy shower. Until Sarah found out. Immediately she forced me out and warmed herself up instead. While she did that, I attempted to download some new tv shows. DRAMA, all our movies and tv shows had disappeared. For some reason the sd card wiped itself clean. I gave up after a while and had a nap on the bed. 10 minutes later Ann was at the door, and the four of us went out for tea.

• As well as being an amazing resort already, they kept adding to their charm by offering a free shuttle to wherever their guests required. We saw a place during our arrival earlier on. It was called Cafe Des Artistes, and decided that’s where we’d go. We were driven 5 minutes down the road, and were given a card by the driver upon arrival. We were to use it when we wanted to go back. Unfortunately I had picked up a cold from somewhere, most likely our reintroduction to the a/c units in Singapore. My bed was directly under a unit in the hostel there. This was a real shame because it meant I couldn’t taste the mouth watering beef steak I had in front of me. I let Sarah have a bite to let me know what it was like, and her jaw hit the floor.
“Oh my god, that’s amazing”, I believe were her words. After eating we sat around talking for a while before asking for the bill. I think we overloaded the waiter with demands when he arrived. As well as requesting the bill, we also asked him to phone our resort for the shuttle, told him our room numbers, and a time for collection, then asked him where the nearest convenience store was. It was a lot to take in, but amazingly he did it all. The bill arrived, the shuttle was booked, and down the road, and around the corner we could locate the store. As soon as we paid, we went to the Circle K for a cash withdrawal and water. When we returned to the restaurant the shuttle was ready and waiting.

• Back in the room I got Simon on the case, and together we solved the mystery of the missing videos. All we had to do was try a new sd card and it triggered something inside. When I replaced the new card with my old one they’d reappeared. Our daily time wasters were still there. Ann and Simon returned to their room shortly after, then I watched some tv shows with Sarah. After a couple episodes I Skyped my mum. She was in good spirits, if not having cold feet about retirement which was just around the corner. During our call she showed me a new toy my dog Rocky liked. It was one of those long pronged head massagers. He sat as still as a log as she gently stroked his head with it. His little eyes closed and I am pretty sure I saw a smile. It was getting on for midnight by the time we’d finished talking, and to see off the evening we put on “Eat, Pray, Love”. But rather than watch the whole film we just skipped to the Bali bits. It was a shame to think that that film had probably boosted tourism, it looked so peaceful and quiet in the movie. Nowadays the reality is more a case of loud groups of Australians coming over for a cheap holiday.

Day 212: Tanah Lot For Nothing

After going into extreme detail the past few days, I am going to attempt to keep today’s post relatively short. The reason being I didn’t actually do much. For me the best part of today was spent chasing my tail trying to catch up with old work. We did do one touristy thing during the evening when we visited a Hindu temple. Other than that we took it slow for the first time since Ann and Simon’s arrival.

• Sarah and I woke up when the alarm clock rang at 9:45am. We figured that’s about the time her parents would be ready. How wrong we were. After taking the time to get up and dressed, when Sarah knocked on their door she discovered they were still in bed. Come. 10:30 they were ready, and the four of us went out for breakfast.

• There was a neighbouring resort just down the road from ours which had a restaurant open to anyone. We found a nice table in the shade and each ordered a breakfast set from the menu. The pool of the resort was a lot nicer than ours, and it had a large decorative waterfall built onto the side of it. By the time we’d finished eating, two hours had passed. Both Sarah and I were extremely tired after having gone to bed late, and not having the luxury of a lie in. Instead of going back to the room to rest, after settling the bill they all went to the beach, while I forewent it to work on my blog in my room.

• I locked myself away in the room like a recluse. For the length of time the guys were at the beach I was reading over old posts, correcting errors as I went. I didn’t realise before how much I’d actually written. Each one took me a good 40 minutes to check over. At one point the cleaners came, and like the agoraphobe I was becoming, I almost sent them away. Then I thought it best they came in and tidied up a little. It took them all of ten minutes to give the room a once over, leaving a freshly made bed and spotless bathroom in their wake. I then got back into bed and engrossed myself in my work. After typing, re-typing, reading over, and making corrections, three hours had passed. After that amount of time the guys returned.

• Sarah came in making demands right off the bat:
“Come on, we’re going to the pool”, she said abruptly
“I don’t think so”, was my response.
“I am really busy and almost done with this one post”, I continued.
“But you’ve been in here hours, and we even stayed on the beach that much longer to give you more time”, she said in an attempt to guilt trip me.
“No Sarah, you can’t say that. I didn’t ask you to stay there, and this is my trip too. I chose to stay in the room because I had work to do. That was your prerogative to stay longer”. I retorted. “By the way, you look very tanned”. I said in an attempt to steer the conversation in another direction. Sarah then stood around looking bored after only 30 seconds. After a minute she gave up and went to see her parents next door. When she came back I was all but one paragraph from the end. I saved what I’d done and handed her the phone. She went on Facebook and immediately her mood shifted. Such a mercurial being. Sarah took a quick shower, then grabbed her parents, and we all went for dinner downstairs.

• Ann, Sarah, and myself all had the same meal. A chicken burger with fries. Simon on the other hand had a spicy Balinesian dish. While we were waiting for the food to arrive Sarah FaceTimed her sister and niece. It must have been strange for Isla to see the two people she was used to seeing in person on a little screen. They all made coo-coo noises to keep her entertained, then they said goodbye when the food arrived. It was another prize winning dish by the Grandma staff. Our burgers were surprisingly heavy, and contained a decent sized patty. When we finished we had just enough time to go back to the room to get changed, before grabbing a taxi to visit a Hindu temple.

• Just before the restaurant we’d visited earlier that day, there was a tourist shop which acted as a taxi service when needed. We hired one of the drivers to take us to a place called “Tanah Lot”. This Hindu temple was recommended to Sarah and her parents by her brother Marc. I don’t think it was so much the temple he wanted us to see, as it was the sunset behind it. The drive there was very nice, if not congested in places. We passed many small rice fields, and at one point Sarah pointed out a volcano in the distance. It was then she suggested we climbed one during our time in Bali. On the way to the temple Simon made small talk in the front with the driver. He told him many facts about the differences between the driving regulations of Bali and England. It seemed anything went in Bali, whereas in England they’d fine you for simply sipping on water whilst parked at a red light. The journey took 45 minutes to reach Tanah Lot, and we had to pay 30,000 rupiah each for admittance. We then made our way down the street to locate this “beautiful” temple.

• Maybe I’d seen too many temples by now, but I felt disappointed with what we saw. Granted what we could see of the temple looked ok, but the most part of it was hidden behind bushes. There were hundreds of people with cameras in tow snapping away, and there was even one Balinesian man sat with a large python. I presumed he was making money from anyone who wanted to hold it. It was clear this place was quite touristy. The only time anyone could reach the temple was when the tide was out. Any other time it was blocked by strong waves. We made our way across the wet slippery stones only to find the main entrances were shut off, and there were Hindus sat around keeping people out. It turned out you could only enter if you were Hindu. The sun was still setting in the stormy sky, but it was nothing like the ones I’d seen before. I felt sorry for Ann and Simon as its places like that, that the sunset should be spectacular. They were let down once again by the bad weather. In the end we went to higher ground, and sat at a bar over looking the lonely looking temple. As we sipped on our drinks the sun set lower and lower, turning the sky around it a purply pink colour. All that was left visible of the temple was its dark silhouette, and in the distance we could see lots of lights coming from boats on the horizon. It was then Ann and Simon taught me a new word… flotilla. It’s a collective term for the sea baring vessels. More and more lit up as the evening went on. When it got dark it began raining, fortunately we were under a parasail and we managed to finish our drinks under shelter. Afterwards we paid up and began making our way back.

• As we left we could hear chanting coming from a second temple beside us. Ann was keen to try and look over the short wall to see what was happening, but was left disappointed when she couldn’t get a good enough view. Sarah then noticed something in a small local coffee shop next door. They had a sign which said “Luwak Coffee”. This was a type of coffee they harvested from the droppings of the Luwak. They had three of these animals on a wooden climbing frame they’d built for them. There was one adult and two younger ones. Sarah asked me to take a photo of her beside them, but I had my trepidations as I didn’t know if it was above board. The animals seemed happy enough as they had the freedom to run around, they could even leave if they wanted, but chose to stay. I just didn’t know where they’d come from in the first place. I took some pictures before the pair of us caught up to her parents. When we were all back together, we returned to our taxi driver and he took us home.

• On the way Sarah was enquiring about other places we could go that night. Secretly I was hoping she’d stop, as I was tired. All I wanted was an early night. But I knew it was Sarah’s parent’s holiday, and if they wanted to go somewhere I’d have happily accompanied them. Fortunately the driver told us all the markets were closed, and if we wanted to go he’d only drop us off. We’d be stranded. Instead we just went back to Grandma’s, but we did enquire about prices to Ubud for the following day before getting out of the car. He gave us a reasonable figure, much like the driver did the day before, and even said we could visit a nice beach before we set off. We considered his offer and returned to our hotel to mull it over.

• We each went back to our rooms, where we remained for an hour or so. I used that time to further read over my blogs. By the time I’d finished, I had only one more day to read over. After an hour or so of being back, we decided to go out for food again. Ann suggested going somewhere other than our hotel. The first place we tried was double the price of Grandma’s, but “Benny’s” next door was perfect. They sold cheaper food, but it was just as delicious as Grandma’s. Ann liked it more than the rest of us. She adored everything about the place, the small pond with a fountain, the shape of the building, the decorative lighting, and even the house band. She liked it so much in fact that she asked to have her picture taken in front of it. We were all mighty impressed with our meals. I had the chicken hot plate, it came with BBQ sauce and fries, and it reminded me of something I’d order back home. In that moment I was almost as happy as Ann. I did feel rude during tea, as I was playing on my phone the whole time. I was adamant I’d finish uploading my blogs to the Internet now that I’d checked over them, and the restaurant had a better internet connection than our hotel. I didn’t mean to come across as rude, but I feel as though I’m suffocating if I don’t stay on top of them. I am so sorry Ann and Simon, I know you’ll be reading this, and I can only hope you’ll accept this apology. It was rude of me to be so anti-social during a sit down meal. I hate it when people play on their devices during diner, and there I was being the worlds biggest hypocrite.

• After our meals Ann wanted to stay and watch the band a little longer, but nobody else did. Sarah tried encouraging Simon, but he didn’t fancy it. Sarah then offered herself, but Ann had changed her mind. We said good night in the hallway and retired to our rooms. Sarah began packing her bags, while I stayed on the bed finishing up the blogs. By the time I’d finished adding keywords and photos to each one, it was almost midnight. Even when we’d managed to get in early for once, we were still up late. After catching up with myself, Sarah had packed her bag. I picked out an outfit for the next day, packed the last of my things, and finished off with a shower. When I was dry I had the pleasure of working some more on the blog. You see, although I’d finally caught up, I hadn’t actually. As I still had today to write about. Now I am on the final paragraph the time is 2am, which wouldn’t be so bad if we were getting a lie in, but we weren’t. Instead we’d be getting up at 8:30am to travel southern Bali, before heading to Ubud. If I could give one piece of advice to anyone with an addictive personality it would be… “DON’T START A BLOG!! IT WILL CONSUME YOU!!!”

Day 211: Semin-Yuk

Today was similar to mine and Sarah’s time on the islands. The four of us didn’t do much, instead we sat on the beach for a while, took a stroll, and visited a market. Yet somehow having only done so little we still managed to walk so far. We walked for miles, at least that’s how it felt. And once again our day didn’t end until gone midnight.

• For some unknown reason Sarah felt the need to wake me up early this morning to know the time. There was no reason for this as we didn’t need to be up and ready until 10am. Just one of her many quirks I guess. Her defence was that she couldn’t sleep comfortably knowing there wasn’t an alarm set. After getting back to sleep neither of us woke up until 9:30am. Sarah was the first to get ready, with me leaving it until 9:55 in order to be causally late for breakfast.

• When we were ready we headed downstairs to enjoy breakfast at the hotel’s restaurant. The food was well presented, but that usually means you don’t get very much. In this case one small hash brown was all I received, when on the menu I could’ve sworn they were plural. After eating we returned to our rooms to apply sunscreen and pack the dry bag with goods. When everyone was ready we set off for the beach.

• Our hotel was perfectly located, no more than 500m away was the sandy beast. When we arrived the first thing I noticed was the size and frequency of the waves. No wonder there were so many surf schools around Bali, these waves were perfect for it. I’ve always wanted to learn how to surf, so by the time we leave the island, hopefully I will have partaken in a class or two. The sand itself wasn’t very nice. It was a dark colour, we presumed it was because there were a lot of volcanoes on the island, and the sand contained volcanic ash. A little way down the beach the waves were a horrible orangey brown shade. Why that was we didn’t know, but it made the place look dirty. Instead of sitting near the entrance to the beach we continued until we got bored. Along the way we passed luxurious looking resorts, one of which contained a really long infinity pool. There were sun loungers every 5 yards along the beach, each set had Balinesian men heckling to get our attention as we walked by. After walking for about a mile we could see a construction sight in the distance, and we were no longer coming across loungers. That was when we chose to turn around and hire some sun beds in the direction we’d just come. Sarah did the haggling, at first the man wanted 50,000 per bed, but after Sarah read in the lonely planet they should only cost 15,000, that’s what we paid.

• The waves were deceiving. One minute they’d keep at bay on the shore, then all of a sudden they’d come right in as far as our beds. Even coming as far as where we were led, leaving us surrounded by water until they went out again. By now I was miles behind on my blog, so for the whole time we led there I read over old ones hoping to catch up. All the while Sarah was trying to tell me fun facts about Bali from the lonely planet. I wish I could have given her more attention as everything she was saying sounded like great fun, and it made me wish we’d come to Bali sooner. But my blog was my curse, and so long as she was around I’d never truly be free. After a couple hours there was a slight drizzle of rain. In the distance we could see a huge team of storm clouds coming in, so we packed up shop and returned to our hotel.

• Just in the nick of time. As we were walking back the rain came down a little heavier, but by the time we’d reached our rooms the heavens had opened. Sarah and I both took showers to get rid of any sand stuck to our bodies. We moved around like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible. We were extremely careful not to get any sand on the bed or surrounding area, as it’s a horrible substance to sleep with. We also used the bum spray hose to push any loose sand down the drain, all in all the sand removal was a success. When we were dried and dressed we all sat in the restaurant while we waited for the storm to pass. As time went on the rain grew less and less, until eventually it stopped. This was our time to strike. We decided to take a stroll around Seminyak to see what we could see.

• Seminyak isn’t a pretty place. To say it’s in Bali, it certainly doesn’t look like a place you’d associate with it. As I’ve said before, the roads are of bad quality, the hustle and bustle of traffic is a nightmare, and it just looks outright dirty. Thanks to the rain the roads were soaked, large puddles formed in the cambers, so when any cars passed they splashed us. That wasn’t fun. The strange thing about the area were the salesmen. Every shop we walked by we were constantly heckled by the owners.
“My friend, good’ay mate, hello my lovely”, were just some of the many terms of endearment they used to try and pry us in. I was actually in the market for one particular item… a plug adapter. Everywhere else we’d had no problems charging our devices, except for Indonesia. It had a different socket to the others. Instead of a three pronged plug like home and Singapore, and instead of the two flat pin plugs like Thailand, Vietnam, and the others, Bali required two circular pinned plugs. Even attempting to stretch our current plugs didn’t make a difference, so an adapter would be something we’d need given the fact we’d be here for 3 more weeks. I enquired at one shop but after the man said 100,000 (£6) I said “no thanks”, and walked away. There would be other cheaper places to go.

• As we continued around the many different roads, two more things made themselves apparent. The road users didn’t care how they got around, and there were countless offerings to the gods lining the pavements all over. In fact you had to go careful not to kick them as you walked. They were only small decorative pieces comprised of a banana leaf, some small colourful flowers, and a few incense sticks. It wasn’t much, but to the people it was a huge deal I’m sure. As for the traffic, Sarah and I were completely used to the mayhem by now. Especially after visiting Hanoi, Vietnam. This was tame if anything, but to Ann and Simon it was pandemonium. Every junction had no lights to control the flow, it was a case of do or die. Every driver manoeuvred around the other in a vehicular ballet of horn blasting and narrow misses. As we walked along the pavements we had to watch out for the odd scooter rider who was too impatient to wait on the road. It made Simon and Ann laugh, but to Sarah and I this was day to day living. They made sure to capture the sight on camera, and I’m sure this would be one of the things they’d take home with them to tell to others.

• We didn’t achieve anything by the end of our walk, only learning that Seminyak was quite a dirty place. Fingers crossed for Ubud – our next stop. When the four of us couldn’t stand the constant honking and swerving traffic any longer, we took a side road which lead to the beach. From there we could easily navigate our way back peacefully. Seeing as it was 6pm by this point we decided to stop in one of the many beach bars for a beer. We located the best one with large beanbags outside, which made for really nice chairs to relax on as we drank. I had a large Bintang, as did Simon, whereas the girls only had small ones. We were hoping to see a great sunset because of how cloudy the sky was. Past experience had taught us it usually made for the best ones. However, tonight was an exception. It was too cloudy and dark. The setting sun still reflected on the shore whenever it broke through the odd patch in the sky. Instead of seeing a sunset, we were treated to the hilarious sight of a dachshund attempting to mount a much large dog. Where the dachshund was so small it fell over every time. There was also a brief moment where Simon fell asleep, which Sarah cheekily caught on camera. After our drinks we found the exit we wanted and returned to the hotel.

• I took the second shower of the day when I got back to the room, for the same reason as the first. To get rid of the sand. Because I got back ahead of Sarah and her parents (because they all walk so slowly) she gave me the bad news. They had been discussing it and came up with the idea of going to another market. At first I said I wasn’t going, and would instead stay behind to work on my blog. I even went as far as sitting in the shower and folded my arms like a toddler to show my distaste for the idea. When I got out and dried I put on my pyjamas bottoms and began reading through old blogs. It was then Sarah said this night be our last opportunity to get clothes, as they had removed the big markets in Ubud to make room for new building, thanks to the increase in tourism. This could’ve been, and probably was, just a ploy to trick me into going. Either way it worked. I then got dressed and the four of us went to reception. There Sarah got information about a so called “good indoor market” named Krishna market. The receptionist then told us it should cost no more than 50,000 rupiah for a taxi. After finding one outside, that’s all we paid.

• When we reached this indoor market we were greeted at the entrance by a lady with stickers. These were welcome stickers you received just for showing up. If only everything in life was so rewarding. It turned out to be a complete dive. Inside it was like a hybrid of Lidl, Primark, and TK Max, all rolled into one. It appeared to be a wholesale place where all the locals went to buy clothes and household items. It wasn’t what we had in mind, and I think we were the only foreigners there. It’s safe to say we didn’t stay long before finding another taxi driver outside to take us away.

• The driver was really friendly and spoke great English. He told us of the many things to do in Bali, and even said any longer than 3 weeks would be too much. As there are day trips you can do which last around 10 hours, and they take you all around the island to see the hotspots. With trips like that you’d see the island in no time. We asked him how much it would cost us in a couple days time to get a taxi to Ubud. He said it would cost around 400,000 if we wanted to make stops along the way to various tourist attractions, but if we wanted to go straight there it would be around 250,000 rupiah. He then gave us a business card so we could contact him on the day, and told us when we reached Ubud he had a friend there who could drive us around.

• The driver took us to Legian street (pronounced Leg-e-an), as there were market stalls and shops which were still open. By now I was still unhappy because of the ever present thought of having my blogs to attend to. This is what I mean when I say it’s a curse, when I’m on top of them it’s great, but when I get behind, it plagues me and won’t let go. We did a whole loop of the block, looking at each shop as we went. It wasn’t until the second time around that I cheered up, and began to forget about the blog. At first I was annoyed by the constant presence of the shop owners watching over me as I looked at their goods, but after a while I made a joke of it. I found the more you had a laugh with them, the more fun the bartering process became. They tend to use the “good’ay mate” phrase a lot, on account of all the Australians that fly to Bali for their holidays. These shops were amazing, granted they stocked the worst quality copies in Asia, but for the prices they were asking, it was practically a steal. It also kind of made me wish I’d bought more clothes in the previous countries because of the poor quality. In the first shop I managed to buy a pair of Quicksilver board shorts for 80,000 (£5.40). Bargain. In the next shop I had more of a laugh with the shop owner. He noticed I had a bag with a newly purchased item in, so he asked me how much I’d spent. I lied and said 70,000, and pointed at some board shorts he had for sale so he knew what was in my bag. He then said quietly to me, “I give you good price, 60,000”. I wasn’t interested in any more boardies until then. Instead I had my eye on a bright pink pair of Bintang swimming shorts. After rifling through the boardies on offer, I found a pair I liked. I managed to buy both for 100,000 (£6.74). They’d probably fall apart in less than 24 hours, but for the time being I was ecstatic with my haggling skills. I left the store like a merchant buying god.

• The next, and possibly most important item on my agenda, was a pair of trainers. Seeing as I’d slacked off exercising for so long, and the rebuild of Ben Norris 2.0 went out the window no sooner than it started, I’d need some good trainers for the gym in Oz. I really liked the light weight Nikes on offer, but after asking in several stores, nowhere stocked my size. One shop owner even said I had Kong Kong feet. Sometimes I wonder if they know they’re being offensive and just say it anyway. I only laughed before we continued on the search. Eventually, when we reached the end of the shops, we found one more shoe store. This was my last hope. We asked about their biggest sizes in the light weight Nikes, but they too only went up to a UK 9. That was too small. To give them their due, they are very god at estimating your size just from looking. He predicted I was around a twelve, and said he had some which were bigger. He pointed to the Vans, but they’d be too thick and sweaty for what I wanted them for. He then found a different pair of Nikes which were incredible. They were a little grubby looking around the bottoms, but that could be fixed. They were a pair of purple and black Nike Airs. These would be perfect for the gym. He said he had sizes 11 and 11.5. Before leaving England I was a UK 13, but could just about get away with squeezing into a 12. I tried them on anyway, not thinking they’d fit, but much like Cinderella, they were a perfect fit. Perhaps because I’d lost so much weight this trip my feet had too, or perhaps the shoes measurements were off. Either way I was elated to find out these beautiful knock offs fit me. Next came the haggling process. He started off asking for 550,000 (£37), they were nice looking shoes, but at the end of the day they were still fakes. Sarah did the haggling for me, for some reason, and they both spoke in Aussie dollars.
“He doesn’t want to pay anymore than 35 dollars”, speaking like I was some high class client of hers who operated behind the scenes.
“No, you give me a better price”.
We were adamant I wouldn’t budge. When he thought we were about to leave, and he was about to lose custom, he cracked.
“Ok, ok, you can have for that price”.
I always feel bad when they give in like that, like I’m giving them a bum deal. But at the end of the day I am sure they start their prices off at an insultingly high level anyway. for now though, I had managed to buy a great looking pair of trainers for just £23. Just as I was about to pay, Ann and Simon stepped in and told me to put my money away. They said they would buy them for me as a birthday present (which by the way readers is on the 24th of May). I thanked them sincerely for their kindness, then shortly after my purchase Sarah was blinded by all the shoes, and even more so at the possibility of buying a cheap pair for herself. It was too much for her to handle and she cracked. She ended up getting a pair of bright blue low top Vans for just £6.50. Another bargain. After that, Ann and Sarah bought some coasters for their home, then we called it quits on the shopping. We then walked around the block one more time until we found somewhere to eat.

• We found one of the best restaurants yet. It was called “Mozzarella”, and they sold dishes which were out of this world. We each had a different plate, and were each happy with what we got. I don’t remember the others orders because I was too wrapped up in what was going on on my plate. I had the wrapped chicken steak. For the first time since being away I actually got a whole chicken breast, not the scraggly little bits you wouldn’t even give to a dog. It was a chicken breast wrapped in bacon and came with mashed potato and a mushroom cream sauce. One word. Delicious. At the end was where it all fell apart. We had the monstrous job of figuring out who owed what, and who owed what to whom from earlier that day. It all became very confusing, so I sat back and watched Ann the banker and Sarah the stress ball work it out. The right money was paid, and the correct change received. We then left for our hotel.

• We decided against a taxi when we learned it wasn’t too far a walk. Around 20 minutes they said. I still wish we’d got one, it would’ve saved a lot of time, and would’ve meant we got in before midnight. On the walk back were constantly beeped at by passing taxis to let us know they were available if we wanted. We walked and walked but didn’t recognise any of our surroundings. Simon was the only one with the keen eye, after remembering what he’d seen in the taxi earlier on. Ann and Simon needed to get money out on the way back, but had to go without when none of the machines worked. I was always much farther ahead than the others, not because I was in a mood, or because I didn’t like them, it was just because my legs were much longer, and they walked a lot slower. I stopped several times for them to catch up, but time and time again I found it kept happening. I was always about 15 metres ahead. In the end I gave up waiting because I just couldn’t walk at their pace. I got back to the hotel before them and was in my pyjamas by the time Sarah reached our room. We said our good nights at the door, then got comfy on the bed.

• We put the telly on to see what sort of channels they had. It was when I found the MTV channel that I discovered possibly the worst tv show ever created. Why tv companies waste good money to make atrocious television like this, and why people invest their time watching the idiots on it is any wonder to me. The tv show was called “Geordie Shore”. It’s a reality show set in Newcastle, and it follows a group of mid-twenty something’s who can’t have a single brain cell between them. The guys are all about fake tan, muscles and women. And the women are all about fake tan, make up, and daddy issues. What a crock of **** that show is. I was both captivated and appalled at the same time. I found I couldn’t stop watching it just because I wanted to see what stupid thing they did next. It was funny to see subtitles running across the screen each time they spoke. This was so the American viewers could understand the drivel that came out of their mouths. I remember Cheryl Cole was kicked off America’s Got Talent’s judging panel because nobody could understand her Geordie accent. Speaking of which, she is just as bad as the cast on that show. God, I knew watching that show would irk and irritate me. The cast get glory for nothing. Why do people like that exist, off screen no doubt they all have god complexes, believing they are celebrities. All they are, are bottom of the barrel Z-listers, who have amounted to nothing but boozing and swearing in tv. Take that away and what do they have really. Now, that’s enough about that. My little rant is over. The second the tv show went off I began working on my blog. That was, after I got the phone back from Sarah of course. She had sent our friend Beth a massive message. I think Beth would need a book mark to go along with it, it was practically an essay. It was 1am when I started, and it’s 3:30am now that I’ve finished. Oh the joys of being a writer. Hopefully tomorrow I’d have caught up and I’d have a little more time to myself.

Day 210: Sling Your Hook

Today we left sunny Singapore. We saw one last tourist attraction, “The Raffles Hotel”, before wasting time at shopping centres until our flight to Bali. Everything went to plan with no hiccups. The only downside to the day involved a smelly Frenchman, but you’ll have to read on to find out about that. By the time we reached Bali it was late afternoon, and even later still by the time I’d finished this blog. I hope you enjoy today’s post, as it didn’t half take long to write.

• I must have slept funny throughout the night, as when I woke up I was left with a stiff neck and sore throat. One thing’s for sure, I was definitely dreaming nonstop. You know you’re using the Internet too much when you start dreaming about having a bad connection. Sarah wasn’t long behind me in waking up, then we spent the next 40 minutes getting ready and packing our bags. When everything was back in the holdalls we went downstairs to put them in storage. Sarah then hired a locker for the day for our day bags, while I made us breakfast.

• We agreed to meet Sarah’s parents outside at 11am. Just as we were finishing up our toast Simon appeared outside the window. I washed up our things, then we went outside. There was a slight moment of panic when Ann and Simon didn’t have my day bag. It was the second time this trip that it was temporarily lost. It was now more important than ever as it contained mine and Sarah’s hospital bills, without those we couldn’t claim on the insurance. I specifically remembered leaving it in their room beside their safe, but both Ann and Simon said they had no recollection of seeing it there. Immediately we returned to their room, only to find it hidden on the shelf below the safe. I wasn’t that concerned, I knew it would be there as the hotel they were staying in was very secure. It was unlikely anyone would have sneaked in to steal it. We then returned to our hostel to put all the day bags in the safe, and headed to the MRT around the corner.

• The destination: The Raffles Hotel. This building was very exotic looking looking, and was famous for being the birth place of the cocktail “the Singapore sling”. At £11 equivalent to enjoy one at the bar we didn’t bother. Instead we admired the architecture and surrounding grounds, and had brunch in the cafe. All around us were tall white pillars which propped up the even whiter ceilings, and there were long corridors leading to even more elegance. It was easy to see that the Raffles hotel wasn’t a cheap build. A lot of time and effort had gone into the chalk white walls and beautiful gardens. There was a stunning fountain which sat solemnly in one of the many courtyard as well. It would have been nice to stay there for a night, just to see how the other half lived, but at this point in my life it was way out of my price range, and given the way I was dressed I definitely wouldn’t have fit in. Before stopping for food we moseyed around the gift shop. As soon as you walked through the door there was a miniature model of the hotel and surrounding roads. So far it appeared we’d barely scratched the surface, although, a lot of it was reserved for guests only. Such as the swimming pool on the roof. Every item in the shop was highly priced, and rightly so, everything looked like it was made of expensive materials. There were strange items for sale, such as boot polish. It just goes to show, people with money will buy anything. So long as it comes with some level of status they’ll buy it. Who spends 30 plus dollars on boot polish for goodness sakes. Simon seemed to think there would have been a pot in each room for the guests. Some of the other more ridiculous items included umbrellas, plastic carrier bags, and baseball caps. Everything had the Raffles Hotel stitched/ printed on to it in one way or another. After looking around we passed the many designer shops (like Louis Vuitton) and went to the cafe.

• Their snacks and drinks weren’t that badly priced. Unlike the Singapore sling you could get coffee for just 6 dollars, which was about £3. Most things were the same price as home. We each had a cup of coffee and enjoyed some cakes. Sarah took some photos of us sat inside (making me feel like we looked cheap for doing it), then Ann and Simon pocketed some napkins and sugar. You only live once I guess. Now the thieves were feeling high on life from their high stakes steal, we decided to leave. While the girls visited the bathroom I noticed a shop with expensive paintings hanging on the walls. I felt drawn to the pieces on offer. Granted I couldn’t afford the 4,500 dollar price tag, but I really loved the artwork. I asked the man behind the counter who they were by, and he responded by saying they were done by a Singaporean street artist named Zero. Zero did something I’d never seen before, he uses spray paints on canvas to create truly unique and brightly coloured pieces. I took a free art booklet, and slip of paper with the names of each piece on, and quickly snapped a few pics while the man wasn’t looking. When I got back to the others we spent the next hour or so wandering around the Marina Square, and Marina Bay shopping malls.

• Because we had time to waste until we had to be at the airport, the malls were (according to Sarah) the best place to go. In the first complex (Marina Square) the girls looked around a couple shoe stores, thankfully I had a booklet from the art shop to keep me occupied. When Sarah was done looking we began making our way towards the exit. That was until the words “Raymond Weil” caught my eye. Simon also had an appreciation for a fine watch, so he joined me as I went inside the shop. The story of how I came about this particular watch brand goes back some way.
Once upon a time I was flicking through a “Men’s Health” magazine when I saw a page advertising the most stunning watch I’d ever seen. It had a large square shaped, rose gold frame surrounding a black face. Either side of that were brown leather straps. What the picture failed to show was the cost of this beautiful timepiece. This had left me curious ever since, even after going on the company’s website I still couldn’t find out its cost. Well, after going in the shop today I got my answer. It turned out this watch was still in production, but they didn’t stock it in store. Instead there was a similar looking piece in silver. After talking with the woman we found out why. She said, and these were her words…
“We don’t have it here, but we can phone the manufacturer to order you one in. Just to give you an idea of how much it would cost, it’s around 28,000 Singaporean dollars!”
I then burst out laughing like never before. In English money that was 14,000 pounds. She then joked that I had expensive tastes. Well after seeing the expensive artwork earlier on, and always having a space in my heart for that watch I guess she was right. We thanked her for her time, then rejoined the others.

• It was another hot day in Singapore, so the small walk between the two shopping centres was a sweaty one. Again we had to cross the Helix bridge to reach Marina Bay, but we were thankful for the a/c inside. If anything it was too cold. Just outside the front doors were men on harnesses climbing down the large glass windows giving them a clean. It made for a funny photo for the blog. The plan was to go to the Gardens by the bay one last time for Ann, as she was still in love with them from the first light show. I said I’d catch them up as I wanted to check out the ice skating arena on the ground floor. While I made my way down, the others climbed the escalators towards the roof. After I noticed the arena only had a thin smooth later of ice I ran back to catch up, only to find them coming back down complaining that it was too hot. It was true, when I reached the top of the escalator I immediately felt the heat, it was practically palpable. Heat does rise after all, and being on the roof was probably the worst place to be, even the door handles were hot to the touch. In the end we went back down to the ground floor (beside the ice rink) to eat dinner. I didn’t enjoy mine, but the others did. Afterwards we caught the MRT back to Chinatown to collect our bags.

• When we all had our bags we met outside our hostel. Simon then waved down a Mercedes Benz taxi (flash I know) and by some miracle we managed to squeeze all our luggage into the boot bar one, my bag. Instead it went on Simon’s lap in the back. Somehow 2 suitcases, a holdall, and three day bags fit in the trunk. We then made small talk with the driver who told us a couple facts about Singapore. He explained how the Gardens by the bay were only constructed last June, so I’d imagine they’d be hosting a special light show next month. He also said there was a new rail system being built which will take people around the outside of the city, even reaching as far as the harbour. So new arrivals by boat won’t have to catch a taxi into the city anymore. Given how efficient Singapore is it wasn’t difficult to believe they’d have it done in the 3 year time frame our driver described. Outside the airport were a list of airlines on numbered signs, this a small thing that made a huge difference. It enabled the taxi driver to locate which door we’d need for checking in. See what I mean about efficiency. Simon paid the friendly driver and left him with a tip, then we grabbed a trolley to take the bags inside.

• It was inside the front doors we played a game of switch-a-roo. We each had a weight limit of only 20kg. Because Ann and Simon brought out our clothes it meant their bags were slightly overweight. Sarah and I took some of the bulky items and we all got through check in smoothly. I’m glad we’d already checked in online, as the people who hadn’t were queueing up for days. After going through security we wasted time in the duty free shops. It was here Sarah got an early birthday present from her mum and dad, a lovely scented perfume. After that we made our way towards our gate for boarding. While moving along on the travelator we were overtaken by a Frenchman. We could smell him before we saw him. Unfortunately he was on the same flight as us. While standing in line we had the misfortune of standing behind him, briefly sarah caught the number of his seat on his ticket. HE WAS SITTING BEHIND US. After we had our bags scanned once again at security, and we located our seats, we felt sick. We were locked in cabin with no air to circulate the smell, so we had no choice but to endure it. Even the woman sat beside Sarah and I was holding her nose. Before taking off it was like a bad joke, almost as if this guy knew he smelled and did it on purpose. He stood up from his seat to put his bag in the overhead storage, each time using over the top gestures causing his armpits to float about beside us. Luckily the sleeves of Sarah’s hoody had traces of perfume on them from the shop, and they masked the stench. But if it wasn’t for that, I was going to pull down the oxygen masks because this was considered an emergency.

• For the next 2 and a half hours I typed my blog and Sarah watched tv shows. The whole time we did battle to breath healthy air and ignore the fact there was a Frenchman acting as an olfactory terrorist. Around 9pm we touched down in Bali, Indonesia. There were some passengers who stayed on the plane to continue to Australia, but as for us we had reached our destination. Sarah and I were among the first people to get off the plane, but we found ourselves having to wait for the others to catch up. Before we could collect our bags from the magical carousel we had to buy visas for Indonesia. Luckily for Sarah and I we had some American dollars in our bag. It came to 50 dollars for the pair of us, whereas Ann and Simon used the Indonesian money they’d purchased in England. It was the first time they were millionaires. When we received our visas it was a case of grabbing the bags, going through one last security check, and finding a taxi to take us to our hotel. One thing of note, as we waited for our bags a Balinesian gentleman wandered over with a trolley. What he was hoping for was to take our bags outside and in return receive a tip. Although we didn’t ask for him, he stayed until I mentioned it to Sarah. She wandered over to tell him we weren’t interested. Poor Simon wasn’t any the wiser to these tricks yet, and would have probably let the man push them for us thinking it was part of the norm. But one thing was clear, we were in a poorer country again.

• It was strange to be somewhere new. Ever since we’d left the islands, Sarah and I had been retracing our steps by going back to places like Pai and Chiang Mai. Bali was unknown territory for me, I was now in the same boat as Ann and Simon. Sarah was the only one to have been here before. Outside the airport was mental, there were more taxi drivers than ever before. They stood in large groups, as well as lining the streets looking for fares – some were even holding name cards. Every single one of them was eager to get your attention in the hopes you’d go with them. But past experience had taught us they were usually the more expensive ones. Seeing as we had just arrived, we hadn’t quite got our heads around the currency, so I am unsure if we got ripped off with what happened next. There was a taxi booth filled with drivers, also waiting for fares. Sarah did all the talking (like usual) and the main guy handling the money said 85,000 Rupiah. Yet on the board behind him it clearly said 60,000 to Seminyak. He then muttered some words about our hotel being too far away in Seminyak, and told us if we wanted to pay 60,000 they’d drop us in the middle of nowhere and we’d have to walk the rest of the way. We didn’t need the attitude, but in his defence he may have felt sick of everyone telling him what the sign said behind him, and accusing him of being a rip off merchant. We paid the money and our new taxi driver also performed a miracle. Although this car was nowhere near as fancy as a Mercedes, all the bags fit in the boot, except for the day bags which went on our laps.

• It was dark outside by this point, and after being in Singapore for the last few days we quickly learned it was worlds apart from Bali. If anything Singapore was the complete opposite end of the spectrum. The first most noticeable thing about Bali at night was the severe lack of street lightning. I don’t know how the driver managed to avoid the countless amounts of scooters pulling out in front of him. Every other junction they’d pull out without warning. The next thing I noticed was the quality of the roads, they were back to being of poor quality. Potholes every few feet and chunks of concrete missing from the edges was a common site. Then there was the fact it looked a little like a slum, there were small local shacks and the occasional convenient store. I envisioned Bali to be this place filled with luscious green forests, and white sand beaches after watching “Eat, Pray, Love”. I was later told by Sarah that Ubud was most likely to be similar to what I had in mind. I’m not complaining about it at all, to me it resembled Thailand slightly, but for Ann and Simon this must have been a slight culture shock. Eventually we left the shacks, badly lit roads, and stray dogs behind us in the rear view, and found ourselves in the more populated area of Seminyak.

• The roadsides were filled with tourists from all over, Indonesian 7Eleven equivalents in the form of Circle K and Mini Mart, as well as fancy bars and tempting restaurants, basically everything you’d associate with a holiday destination. No doubt this was a relief for Sarah’s parents, as up until then I bet they wondered what they’d let themselves in for. After a 15 minute car journey we arrived at the entrance to “Grandma’s Hotel”. It looked amazing. Just what the doctor… sorry, Duxbury ordered. Ann and Simon did a good finding this place. There was a restaurant downstairs which sold both Balinesian and western dishes, a circular pool right beside it, and a spa off to one side. The staff were really polite and friendly, and they checked us in right away. Our rooms were perfect, and kind of resembled the more expensive places we’d stayed. There was a comfy double bed, an en suite bathroom (with a lovely hot shower), and the most important feature of all… a tv. What’s more, it came with countless channels including HBO and Cinemax. We now had movies at our disposal. We didn’t have long before the hotel’s restaurant stopped serving beer and drink. After dropping everything off, Sarah and I went down ahead of her parents.

• The menu was fairly small, but it had everything you could want, including burgers and pizzas. If all else failed they were my go too’s. I was pleasantly surprised by the sounds of the Indonesian foods, and looked forward to trying some. Instead of ordering the pizza I had initially thought about, I had instead the fried chicken in butter sauce. I don’t know if this was an Indonesian dish or not, but it was very tasty. Shortly after our arrival Ann and Simon showed up. Ann and Sarah both ordered the same dish as me, and we all enjoyed some mocktails to go with it. While Simon had a couple beers and a different dish. We’d just managed to get our orders in 5 minutes before closing. At the end came the confusing math lesson as we figured out the currency exchange. It worked out to be roughly 15,000 rupiah to the English pound. The total for the meals came to around 460,000. Which I think worked out to be just over £5 each. It was very clear that Bali wouldn’t be anywhere near as expensive as Singapore, but it would sure as hell be confusing figuring out the exchange rate.

• After our meals we all returned to our rooms, and for once we didn’t have to walk, or travel, 5 million miles to get there. After showering we got into bed and I thought about concluding the evening with a movie. It was then I remembered I was far behind on my blog, and out of some weird sense of guilt I felt I had to do that instead. When we looked at the clock to see what the time was, we discovered it was getting on for 1am. For the fourth night running Ann and Simon had managed to keep us out until gone midnight. Just how did they keep doing this?

Day 209: The Quay To Happiness

It was days like today I yearned for the days of old. The days where Sarah and I led around doing nothing all day. It’s sad to think we needed Sarah parents to put a foot up our backsides to get us going. For the third day running we didn’t get to bed until gone midnight. By then we were absolutely knackered. Muscle and bone achingly knackered. I can’t quite stress how much I ache as I lie here in bed typing about the day’s activities. Today saw us walking even more, we spent the first half of it ambling through markets, following Sarah around. Then we walked around the quay, and in the evening we spent more time walking around the harbour front. It has been another long one folks, so get comfy as I try and piece together how the day played out.

• I will start today from the early hours of the morning. One of the snoring men I described at the end of yesterday’s blog didn’t stop. As I finished typing and I looked around the room, everyone was awake with frustration painted on their faces. Including Sarah. She wasn’t happy one bit, I needed to go to the bathroom anyway, so as I got up I handed her a sleeping pill to help drift off again. It was then that someone else got up to shake the snorer into consciousness. After that the room was quiet and peace was restored.

• I didn’t wake up until 9:30. I played about on my phone for a further half an hour until Sarah opened her eyes. We were supposed to be meeting Ann and Simon at 11, but at the rate we were going about getting ready, it didn’t look promising. As the time grew closer to eleven, Sarah received a message from her parents saying her mum had a headache. This bought us another hour. After having showers and getting ready we went downstairs to have breakfast.

• While I was eating my final piece of peanut butter toast, Sarah’s parents appeared outside the window. I quickly finished up and washed the plate, then we met them outside. It was here that we learned Ann had a large breakfast in bed out of a styrofoam tray – Ann wanted me to include this, I think she just wants an excuse to star in the book that this blog will inevitably one day become. The plan for today was to go to Bugis Street and look around the shopping mall – this was mostly Sarah’s idea. First of all we needed directions. After Sarah ran back inside to ask the receptionist, we learned the best, and quickest way to get there was the bus. The four of us then set off to the bus stop across the street.

• Like everything else in Singapore, their bus service was efficient. Above the bus stop was an electronic sign that showed the arrival times of each bus. Like clockwork, when the three minutes were up, the number 2 bus pulled up alongside us. The fare cost no more than 1 dollar 20 cents, and five minutes later we were outside the world’s busiest mall.

• Briefly I had been there before with the girls, but only briefly. I spent most of that visit getting Spanish lessons from Julio. This time however we were there for a long time. Bugis Mall was comprised of three levels, each one being less busy than its predecessor. The ground floor, or ground zero as I liked to call it, was the most hectic. There were maze like corridors no more than 8 foot in width, each one filled shoulder to shoulder with people. Everyone was pushing and shoving to get by. Not long after our arrival Sarah found a fire exit with a set of stairs leading to the next level. We looked like a team of survivors fleeing a zombie horde. The next level was much nicer. It was still a maze to navigate around, but it was cooler and had about 60% less people. However this turned out to be a bad thing because it gave Sarah a lot longer to look at clothing. Eventually Simon and I left them to it and went up a level in the hopes we’d find some electronics. There were a few stalls, but most of them only sold phone cases and chargers, nothing to get excited about. When we relocated the girls they were still ambling around, the only difference being that Sarah had a couple new bags in her hands. I don’t quite know why Simon and I bothered going up one level, as we only ended up going back there with Ann and Sarah. I should say by this point that it was only Sarah who enjoyed this shopping experience. By the time she’d finished looking at everything, more than two hours had passed. TWO BLOODY HOURS! Even Ann and Simon were telling her to leave come 3pm. Because of the pace we moved at, plus the fact we’d spent the last two days walking nonstop, my legs, feet, and back were hurting something chronic. I was all too glad to be out of there come the end. We grabbed a couple fruit shakes for the road, then attempted to walk to the quay.

• We had to give up in the end, the sun was too bright and hot to stay out in it for long. When we saw the nearest MRT station we studied the map outside, then rode that bad boy to Clarke’s Quay. It turned out we weren’t actually that far away before, but we just didn’t fancy walking in the sun’s blaze. When we reached the surface again I stopped in Burger King for dinner. However I was the only one to eat, looking like a greedy pig as I wolfed down a double whopper meal. During the visit Sarah used my phone to go online and speak to Beth. Because of how expensive perfume is in Australia, she asked Sarah if she’d mind buying some for her at the market. This would mean going back to where we’d come from. If anything I think Sarah was happy to do this, because it would give her an excuse to shop some more. After food Sarah came with us to the quay, saying she’d go back later on, or first thing the following morning.

• Clarke’s Quay was another stop Nora took us to during our scooter tour of Singapore, but it looked a lot better at night. It reminded me of the waterfront of Bristol during the day. We all walked along the water’s edge and crossed a bridge, but when we reached the other side it was nothing but expensive bars and restaurants. It was then we decided to split up, Sarah didn’t want to have to get up early in the morning to go back, so instead chose to leave there and then. Ann went along with her, most likely out of guilt of not wanting Sarah to go alone. Simon and I decided to stay by the quay and go to a bar. We located a pretty pricey bar back across the river which was currently having happy hour. I don’t quite understand why it was called an hour, it went on daily from 11:30am to 7pm, and again from 9pm till late. Either way we took advantage of the offer and enjoyed two beers each.

• It was a nice afternoon. We had the hot weather, the sun was in the final couple hours of its shift, and a cold pint of beer in front of us. Simon and I were left alone for an hour or so, during which time we got the chance to bond a little over drinks. I also got to learn about what was happening back home. The council were back at it again digging up the roads – something which I used to find a nuisance no longer bothered me, the perks of travelling. And from what I could gather there were constant plans to build more supermarkets. How many of those things do people need really? When will enough be enough. After all, there’s only so many nectar points one person can collect. At the rate they’re being built you could probably save enough points to buy your own supermarket. We covered many topics during those beers, and at one point Sarah and I received praise for keeping it together for this long, after being under each others noses for the past 7 months. What can I say, we make a good team. We both have our strengths and weaknesses, the key is knowing how to utilise them to our advantage when needed. Three quarters of the way through our second beers the ladies returned. Sarah had managed to find the perfumes, and even bought one for herself. She complained before that her holdall was heavy (on the rare chance she actually carried it) but after today she’s probably added an extra 5kg to it.

• Rather than faff about on the train again we chose to walk back. We were given directions by our waitress before setting off. We were so close, we couldn’t have been any farther than half a mile away. When we got back my legs were so happy to be able to sit down. We gave each other 20 minutes to get ready, we used it productively by going on Facebook, then met up outside our hostel. I was still feeling pretty full from the beer and burger, so I didn’t really want any tea like the others. I joined them all the same though. We went back to the local food court inside the shopping centre two blocks away. If I’m honest I didn’t like the look of anything the guys ordered. There’s only so many times I can look at rice before it has the same attraction as… “insert your own word here”. Even though I wasn’t that hungry it didn’t prevent me from ordering a mixed meat dish. My plate contained both duck and pork, but I only liked one of the two. When everyone was done eating we left for the Harbour Front.

• Because Ann liked the light show so much the night before, we decided to spend the evening around that area again. Getting there was a nice walk, we passed many fancy architecture which made for good photos. We took a different route to the Harbour Front than the other day, by doing this we ended up following the path we took on the scooter trail. It was in that moment of realisation that we discovered the large local food court Nora had taken us to. Sarah was kicking herself as she had been trying to remember exactly where this place was. We went inside to show Ann and Simon what it was like, as well as the amazing food they had on offer. As we looked around we noticed a group of scooters rested against a table. It was Nora. She had with her another group of travellers. Sarah and I figured she wouldn’t remember us, so we didn’t bother to pester her, instead we walked by with smiles on our faces.

• The Harbour Front wasn’t very far from the food court, when we arrived all the buildings looked fantastic. Because it was a clear sky all of them stood out so well. The Marina Bay Sands looked magnificent as it speared the night sky. Rather than walk the same side of the harbour as last night, we decided to walk the opposite side instead. This way we got to appreciate the famous landmarks, rather than the tall skyscrapers which lined the Singapore skyline. Along the way I saw one of my favourite statues, “The Thinker” by Rodin. As I admired the sculpture I noticed a small etching on the back which read “8/25”. Clearly this wasn’t the real piece, I knew that, that was still in Paris, what these numbers represented were the amount of replicas that were made. Where the rest of them were I don’t know. After the brief stop to look at the knock off, we continued along the harbour until we reached Esplanade bridge where we took a seat halfway along. The Esplanade bridge overlooks the Marina Bay Sands Hotel and harbour, and because of the hour of our arrival it meant we got to see the water show again. I hadn’t realised until now that the show was two shows rolled into one depending on where you were. We saw the show and all its projections the previous night, but from the bridge we got to see a light and laser show. Bright green beams of light were firing down from the top of the hotel to the waterfront, and all along the shopping centre below the roof flashed different colours. I zoned out after a while as my body was crying out for rest. All the muscles in my legs were really aching now. Ann seemed to hate it every time we moved again because her legs were equally as sore. We all seized up anytime we stopped. There was one last thing to see before the pain could be over, and that was the Helix bridge.

• This was the bridge I wrote about a while ago. It was built to represent a DNA strand, otherwise known as a double helix. It was Sarah’s favourite bridge “in the whole wide world” as she put it. And she wanted to show it off to her parents. In all fairness it is an amazing creation. It’s a combination of both metal and glass, not to mention exceptional welding work and craftsmanship. The shortcut through the small Olympic stadium was closed, meaning we had to walk all around the outside. This was even more bad news for my poor legs. When we eventually got there Sarah definitely got her money’s worth. It must have taken us 20 minutes to cross the relatively short bridge. During that time it was funny to watch a couple have their photos taken. The photographer was using a slow shutter speed and would run by with a bright light drawing patterns as he went. The end result would be a beautiful picture with a white pattern around the subjects. But to someone who didn’t know that trick, he was simply an idiot jumping around with a light. At the other end of the bridge was the large Marina Bay shopping centre. When we got inside we were on the top floor, and down below us on the ground floor was a fairly big ice skating arena. I took a photo for the blog, then we had the pleasure of finding the MRT.

• It was so far away, even when we managed to locate it at the end of a long corridor it was a lot farther away than it looked. It was a case of walking, followed by more waking, until we reached the ticket machines. We each updated our tickets and switched between trains to Chinatown. It had gone 11pm by the time we’d got back, and all the market stalls were closed for the night. Which in a way was good I guess, as Sarah would’ve only felt the need to meander. The night still wasn’t over, even when we reached the front doors of our hostel. We needed to print off the flight itinerary for the following day, as tomorrow we’d be leaving Singapore for the more laid back location of Bali. After Simon returned to their room to grab all the documents we needed, Sarah used our computers at the hostel (because they were free) to sort it all out. Even then we still couldn’t go to bed because she couldn’t print the forms. The receptionist told Sarah she’d need to email the documents to her computer in order to print them. This process took bloody ages, and even when they’d printed out Sarah was unsure about them. Regardless, she stapled the forms together. Besides, all the important information was legible, so the people at the airport would accept them for that reason.

• When the pair of us finally figured out how to delete our information, and ensure it was deleted, we were allowed to go to bed. Finally what I’d been waiting for all day, a chance to regain my energy. But oh wait, I can’t rest just yet because for some unknown, stupid reason I started a blog. After yet another two hours of slaving away, giving myself crippled thumbs in the process, I had finished. Shame it’s now 2:30am. Typical, just when I thought it safe to sleep there is another problem. We have in our midst another bloody snorer, and what’s worse is the fact the snorer slayer from yesterday has gone. Maybe if I just pinch this guys nose he might…