Day 163: Those Boys Were Kung Foo Fighting

Well well well, the night was kind of a let down. Because we had been to the beach a couple nights previous we knew what to expect. And there were no more people for the once a month occasion than there were on that fateful night. Apparently most people left Phi Phi to go to Koh Phangan, as that’s the main place to go for the celebrations. The highlight of our evening was watching a free Muay Thai fight at a local bar. The two Thai men put on one hell of a show. They were throwing hard fast kicks at each others heads, fancy backhand punches, and at one point one of the fighters kicked the other through the ring into the crowd. Afterwards they went around shaking everyone’s hands in the audience, and if they wanted, people could pay them money for the show. Audience members could also get involved by climbing into the ring and fighting other audience members, all for the sake of a free bucket of alcohol. Some of them ended up with bleeding noses, begging the question “was it really worth it?”. They had to wear protection though. This came in the form of headgear and shin guards. However, their fights were terrible and mostly involved keeping their distance from each other to avoid getting hurt. This was seen more so when girls stepped in the ring to brawl.

We made a group of new friends on the beach that night, a couple guys from L.A (which always makes me jealous) a couple girls from England, and some more girls from Sweden. They were both extremely tanned and blonde, and I remember having a discussion with one of them about wether or not the Swedish model “Victoria Silvstedt” was attractive. I think the topic came up after I learned they both shared the same first name. One of the L.A guys impressed me when he told me he was a helicopter pilot back home. He looked like a surfer dude, long blonde hair, a beard, and a laid back attitude. So I was very surprised when he told me about his profession. We got talking about the subject when he showed me his tattoo of helicopters flying across the skyline, it looked like a scene from the movie platoon. The funny thing about Alex was how much he resembled the main protagonist of the tv show “Sons Of Anarchy”. Later on in the evening Alex attempted to climb a pole that the fire dancers stood on, but because he was drunk he fell from the top. It was around 8 feet high, and he hit the sand with a thud. Luckily he was ok, the only damage he sustained was a bite to his tongue upon impact. We ended up chatting with everyone closer to the end of the evening, up until then Steve, Sarah and myself were dancing around like idiots. And by the end of the evening Steve found himself alone on the beach with one of the Swedish girls “chatting”, was what he said they got up to. Sarah and I left them to it and we walked Victoria back to her hostel. The pair of us then returned to our dorm to sleep off the booze.

So that was the prelude to today’s activities, now allow me to expand upon today’s events…. Nothing. Literally nothing. I had a hangover so bad that I physically couldn’t have done anything if I tried. I felt so rough that even the simple task of sitting upright made my whole world shatter. At first I was going to stay in bed, in our stiflingly hot room (on accounts of the a/c being turned off after 11am) but found myself walking to breakfast with Steve and Sarah. Along the way we did our best to fill each others blank spots with information of the previous night. Most of which I remembered anyway, and I was happy to know how I got into my pyjamas this time around. We ended up at the same restaurant we ate at the night before, and somehow I managed to eat the English breakfast I ordered. It was then that I checked through the photos on my phone, all that was recorded was our dumb dancing. After breakfast we slowly walked back towards the hostel, stopping halfway for a fruit shake. The hangover was kicking in more and more as we walked, and the heat and humidity wasn’t helping matters at all. Although there was no a/c in the room, it was still cool enough because of the residual air clinging to the walls. We had to ensure the bathroom doors remained shut otherwise the heat came in from outside through the stone arched window frame. All there was to prevent insects getting in was a small mesh grid. There was a single solitary fan rotating side to side on a wall, and seeing as there was a free bed directly beneath it, I spent a good 4 hours resting there to try and cool down my overheated body. But not before leaving a lovely sweat patch on Sarah’s bed as we watched tv shows. Eventually Sarah came over to join me, and we continued to watch shows there instead. Steve was outside the whole time chatting with Fanny. When he returned to us he explained how he had bumped into Alex and his little crew on the beach earlier that day. And he looked at me with a cheeky grin on his face and said “You’ve got an admirer from last night!”, which is always a nice thing to hear on the rare chance it happens. Sarah made jokes that it was probably a guy – nice isn’t she! Steve went on to explain how it was one of the British girls I was talking with, and how when he was talking with them earlier on she was asking about me. It has to be this newly tanned body of mine, first an old masseuse lady, then an English girl, next the world!!!!

Around 8pm that evening we ventured out for food for the second time that day. We stopped by Alex’s hostel first to see if they wanted to join us, but only the girls were there. When Steve came back down he told us they’d meet us at the Muay Thai bar in an hour or so. As we continued walking we ended up bumping into Alex and his friend anyway. We told them the plan and they agreed to meet us. Then the 3 of us went for food at a place called Banana Bar. Steve and I enjoyed a delicious chicken fajita meal, although the wraps were very small for the price, and we had to eat the last of the chicken by fork because they weren’t big enough to hold it all. After the meal we walked to the Reggae Bar ready for the fight. I was still feeling a little rough and thought the only way to feel better would be hair of the dog. I ordered an overpriced beer, then the three of us eventually located a spot that wasn’t so noisy. The music was on full whack, and to speak to one another we had to shout. To begin with the only fights to entertain us were that of the brave audience members. Although, when the bell rang they all resorted to the run away technique. Fortunately each bout only lasted 30 seconds, and for some stupid reason they gave the contenders about 3 minutes to recover between the rounds. It was too long for how little they were contributing. At 11pm, Alex and his friends showed up (including his girlfriend who had been sick for 1 and a half days), also including the girl who took a shine to me the night before. She surprised us all when she volunteered to get in the ring. Steve and I joked that she was doing it to win my affection, but what she really wanted was to beat on a French girl. For the most part of their fight the French girl ran in circles, while my contender smiled and took the occasional jab at her. At the end of each round Alex gave her a pep talk, encouraging her to hit the girl in the face. For the next two rounds it was a very similar outcome to the first, with just a few extra jabs thrown in and my admirer came out the victor. But Sarah’s punches feel a lot harder than hers looked, so in Sarah’s loving arms I remain.

After one more match from the volunteers the real entertainment began. Two very well trained Muay Thai fighters climbed into the ring. One of which fought the night before. Unlike last time we would see the entire match, instead of catching the tail end of the action. The guys didn’t disappoint, after they completed their preflight praying ritual, the bell sounded, and out they came all guns blazing. Each blow was lightning quick, and I caught all three rounds on video. Every strike was accompanied by a loud exertion of air, and the kicks or punches that landed took each man off his feet. Nobody went through the ropes this time, but their fighting skills are truly spectacular. For their size they are deceptively strong, and when the match was over we got a chance to shake one of the fighters hands as he went about the room. I was amazed at how gentle he shook, I was expecting a firm hard jolt, not a soft limp flail. After the Thai men fought it was back to audience participation again, so we left.

I was feeling a lot better after the beer, just very hot and sweaty because of the temperature. We took a group photo with Alex and co, then we all said our goodbyes. Steve, Sarah and myself finished the night by grabbing a slice of pizza for the return walk to the hostel. We played card games for a while, as well as watching Family Guy and FaceTiming Sarah’s sister and niece. The card game was ****head. I won the first round (beginners luck) but lost the second. It ended up being between sarah and I, and she strategically got rid of all the cards she had. She shouldn’t have won, she practically had the whole pack at one point, but sneakily she did it. And what with me being a sore loser, and her being such an “oh look at me, aren’t I so great” sort of winner, I became bitter. She was lucky I gave her a goodnight kiss at all, that’s all I’m saying. I’m still annoyed as I write this sentence. Stupid game, stupid winning girlfriend!!!!! I then stayed up for another hour to type this blog, and because I’ve just had to relive my loss after calming down about it, I have the pleasure of trying to sleep annoyed!!!!!

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