Day 158: Janet Howe, The Lightning Thief

That damn bird was back again, the horny lethario was out on the pull. The same exact time as the morning before too, 5:30am. I didn’t bother getting up to scare him off this time, I was hoping someone else would, but he remained there outside our room singing away. I can usually sleep through anything, but when you’ve got something that sounds identical to an alarm clock, sleep becomes a little tricky. After a while Romeo gave up and flew to another tree, and I was able to move my hand from my ear and fall back asleep.

I was woken up for a second time at 8:30am by another bird, a 5’7″ blonde haired bird. No not big bird from Sesame Street, I’m talking about Sarah Duxbury. She woke me up only to tell me to go back to sleep when she put on a tv show 5 minutes later – I didn’t. I felt like a monster the way she carried on, when I turned over to look at her, her face grimaced and she started with her compliments once again. “Oh god!, oh dear!, What have you done? You silly boy, have you seen your eyes? They’re really puffy!” Were just a few of her kind words. What I had done was burn my eyelids in the sun the day before, mix that with my tired puffy eyes and they looked extremely sore. As I gradually woke up, and after applying some aloe vera they looked a little better. But only a little. They were still very red. For the rest of the day I’d have to live like a vampire, unable to step foot in the sun.

At the end of “The Mentalist”, we got dressed and went out on the bike to buy some suntan lotion. The shop was opposite the bar we stopped in the day before, after the purchase we paid another visit to the French bakery. We enjoyed a inkling breakfast, and I thoroughly enjoyed another slice of blueberry cheesecake. Like always, Sarah remained glued to Facebook throughout the meal, occasionally responding to questions I asked – but only after I said her name several times. When the bill was settled, I rode us down the road to a nicer area of long beach.

As I parked the bike a 4X4 vehicle pulled up behind us. Over the loud speaker was an annoying American mans voice promoting a Muay Thai fight that evening. It was clearly a tape, but it said each word twice, I think the whole thing played at least 4 times before it drove off. We followed the concrete pathway passed some tall trees, and there was something perched on the bark that caught my eye. Upon closer observation I noticed it was the shell of a praying mantis, I took a photo (for blog purposes) and continued to the beach. I sat under the shelter of the tall trees, while my competition soaked up some sun. I noticed another weakness in Sarah as she attempted to read her kindle upon the hot sands – she had no stamina. She couldn’t stick the heat, and therefor couldn’t sit still. Sarah moved from the beach, to the sea, back to the beach. When she came back we noticed a cat on a wall meowing very loudly. It was stuck, it couldn’t move any farther forward, and ended up doing the moonwalk to get back to safety. For some reason, when it jumped down from the wall, it came over and paid us a visit. It lead down beside me in the shade and I petted its little head, before it walked away. Sarah then got another case of ants in her pants, and sat on the beach, the shore, had a swim, then asked me if I wanted to have a coke in the nearby restaurant. We found a table in the shade, and enjoyed a pricey bottle of the fizzy brown stuff each. I say pricey, it was actually only 40 Baht a bottle (80p), but they’re only 17 in the shops (34p). It was during those drinks that my competition named me the victor. Sarah finally said the words I’d been longing to hear “you’re actually really brown now, browner than me!”. YES, about time too! She could have been nice and stopped there, but she clearly felt as though she had to make one last sly remark “you’re still quite red in places, but the bits that aren’t, are really brown!”. Jealousy is a terrible thing!

Sarah visited the beach for another half an hour, while I worked on the blog. Again, she couldn’t stick the heat – the quitter, I led in it for an hour each time! She moved about from the sands to the water, before calling it a day. Claiming she wanted to leave as she felt as though I was bored sat in the restaurant (excuses, excuses). I paid for the drinks and we returned to our bike. As I was about to pull away, a bike with three children on rode last me. They can’t have been any older than 12 or 13, but there they were riding a motorcycle. We stopped in the 7Eleven on the way for some water, then handed in the keys to the bike when we reached our resort. Our 24 hours were almost up, and from then on we’d have to foot it everywhere. Back in the room we both showered, then I led on the bed in front of the fan to cool down, and Sarah chilled out in the hammock. An hour or two later we went for a walk to the hidden coffee shop we found the other day.

We used the Internet for the allotted hour while enjoying some fruit shakes, then returned to our resort. The sun was getting ready to finish its shift as we arrived. We popped into reception to book up a snorkelling trip for the next day, unfortunately it would see us getting up at 8am though. Then we returned to our room. Inside, Sarah was quick to notice we had no toilet roll left – once again! She shouted out “shotgun not”, which apparently exempts her from the duty of getting a fresh one. So back to reception I went, while Sarah enjoyed her kindle on the hammock. Looking like a massive toilet roll abuser, I returned with a new one in hand. Cleverly I shouted over to Sarah that she shouldn’t forget to take an Imodium, and threw the new roll at her from a distance. Like usual she had something to say about that, “great, now it’s dirty from the floor”, were her words.

I stayed beside the fan on our bed for as long as it took me to type up some of the days blog, then suggested going for food. However, Sarah still wasn’t feeling very hungry and chose to remain in the hammock, meaning I had to go to dinner alone. Something that wouldn’t have happened if roles were reversed I’d just like to say. My goodness, the meal I chose has now been added to my top ten since travelling. I’d had this particular dish before but I don’t remember it tasting this good. It was the Massaman curry. I made the wise decision to ask the lady before hand if it was spicy. To which she replied “medium”. By Thai standards, that usually means very spicy, but today that was not the case. The outside temperature was moderately warm anyway, but the reason for me sweating had nothing to do with the curry’s spice level, it was more to do with how hot it was. I had to blow in each mouthful to cool it down, but I couldn’t get it in my mouth fast enough. The taste was out of this world, it was very sweet, and when I mixed the sauce with the rice, a taste infusion kick started in my mouth. I was sad to see the bottom of the bowl, but I was grateful to have found something other than pad thai that I liked so much. After I laid for my meal I turned and walked to the beach. The sun was setting and putting on yet another pretty show, which was surprising as it was quite cloudy and the sun itself was out of sight. I took yet another photo and retired to the hut.

Sarah was still gently swinging in the hammock while reading her kindle. I told her about how great my meal was, and wiped my sweaty face on the towel hanging inside the room. I then led on the bed and began adding finished blogs to the Internet. By chance I rolled over and caught a glimpse of the sky outside. In the short period of time it took me to get back to the room, the sun had dropped significantly, and painted the sky the most beautiful colours I had ever seen. Immediately I jumped up, put on my flip flops and charged to the beach to see the wondrous sight. I felt as though I was staring at a painting, never in my life have I seen the sky the colours that it was that night. It had everything, blues, purples, pinks, oranges, reds, and as the sun set lower and lower the contrast was reduced, making them all a couple shades darker. I took well over 15 photos of the most fantastic sunset the world had ever seen before running back to show Sarah.

We spent around 20 minutes in the room after that, before Sarah said she was ready to go out. She began getting ready, then out of nowhere, the loudest clash of thunder occurred in the sky – I guess the majestic sunset was the calming before the storm. Over the duration of our stay on the island, it had been nothing but hot weather. The atmosphere was now being broken by an overdue thunderstorm. Well, I say that was the case, I think we all know the real story, Janet Howe (my mum) had become the god of thunder after being struck by lightning, and was reigning havoc across the skies. The loud noise scared Sarah into running across the room and into my arms, after I calmed her down she continued getting ready. As we stepped foot outside the door the rain began to fall, and by the time we reached the end of the walkway it was hammering down. This changed our plans of going out for food altogether. We ended up using the resorts Internet, and sat in reception to speak with Sarah’s mum. The thunder and lightning continued the whole time, but it brought with it a cooling breeze. It lightened up towards the end, and after we said our goodbyes we paid the restaurant a little visit.

I guess all the other guests had the same idea, nobody wanted to walk out in the rain which meant there were no free tables. The bamboo terrace was the only free location. It had plastic coverings all the way around, and we were told we could sit there if we wanted. We sat in a recumbent position beside the one foot high table, and ordered some food and drinks – barely talking the whole time due to modern day electronic devices. They’ll be the downfall of us all. When my usual (pad thai) arrived I was pretty full, I managed to force it down all the same, even if Sarah got annoyed at how long I took. At 9:30pm the pair of us called it a night and left for the comfort of our bed. I applied the aloe vera one more time to help heal my pink skin before our all day snorkelling trip the next day. After winding down to some tv shows, I finished my evening by praying to the god of thunder, I asked her to smite down that blasted bird should it try and chat up any more singletons in the early hours of the morning!!!!










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